I love you (Shape poetry)

You're the one who brought me into this world

to give me an opportunity to experience what

life is about.

Also to show

me how the

world works

when we all

start to come

together and

work as one

team. Also

to show me that there is more to life than money

as it can't buy you true happiness or even love.

You are my rock

That keeps me going each and

every day. You put up with my moans

and strops that happen almost every day

but still manage to keep your cool. No

matter the situation you manage

keep it under control without

losing your temper with

anyone. Your smile

can make any

person

smile

too

I can't even begin to say

how much you mean

to me. No amount of

words can describe

you and everything

you do for me and the rest

of the family. You give out

so much love to everyone and

don't expect anything in return, and for

that I have a lot of respect for you mum. I do

love you and will do always until the end.

You and I are one brilliant team together

With an unbreakable bond.

*********************************************************************

Came across this poem when i was checking my bro's literature essay.

Find this shape poetry very nice...very sweet too.

so anyone who is attached rite now, u could grab this poetry and write this to ur partner. i believe she/he sure gets touched. to add on the atmosphere, read to her/him (with emotions, please. this is a poem). i think he/she surely melts and may even cry..

muahhahaha..!!

for me, na...me a single lady now. so no chance to do such thing.

anyway me not interested over such thing now. tired and no mood.

even if any guy confess to me, i only be emotionless and laugh it off, taking it as a casual remark. like what i say, i am skeptical now, so will be putting on guard more than before.

anyway tmr will be a slacking day..!! hopefully can accompany my colleague to go see the inter-department's pool final competition - fighting for championship..hOoO, hope my department will win..

anyway may even consider to take up pool, if i were to be able to be employed back into this company. reasons being? go figure.

going to start my fyp soon. my this project is a research project of a research student. hopefully everything will go smoothly... =s

many of my frens are asking me whether i can cope with the TCM course, my 5 'O' level students, final year project, my core modules, and my family time, including friends.

Frankly speaking, i really have no idea.

I only know i am no longer attached now. so i dun really have to care about myself.

and TCM is the only path to my dream, so i must make sure i have to do well in it.

ok, me shall stop here. very tired now.

Happy birthday to Mantou..!!

Received all the wishes ..!! Thank you, everyone..!!! (^^) i love you all ...!! hahaha.. =p

And haha..thanks, EG, JH and DC for the call. haahha..especially when DC talked to me over the phone, without identifying himself initially, i was asked to guess who he was.
The funny portion was when he described himself as "tall and skinny, with moustache", the first person in my mind was LCB. muahhahaha.. the response by DC was almost highly reactive..!! hahaha..! and of course, when he finally identified himself, i was kinda surprised. one was cos i din expect him to wish me happy birthday, the other was that he bears the same name as dennis. hahaha..last time when i was still attached, i used to look at DC and was wondering how dennis will look if he had the moustache too..hahahhaa..!! and whenever DC sits near me, i will feel nervous cos he has the same name as dennis. haahhaha..! goodness me..



See these two dresses? hee..they were given by the Lame Club..!! hahaha..from M, C, WL, PM, KP etc etc..

So sweet of them..!! i din expect that they remember my birthday, as it's been a real long time since i catch up with them. and i have not been participatin in any of the gathering..

Furthermore, later in the day, they called and sang me a birthday song..!! I am totally touched...!! Almost wanted to cry over the phone..cos i was really touched when they sang together over the phone..!! (T_T) but of course, i din cry...i was so touched that i can't help myself saying, "I love you ALL.." hahahaha..!!

They were really really sweet..!! (^^)

haha..it's a simple action from them but i simply love it..! simple but sweet.. (^^)

And i simply love the dresses..!! Heard that they were chosen by PM and WL..! So sweet..!! Love these two dresses. One is sweet and the other is elegant. I will definitely be wearing the pink one for my colleague's wedding dinner in Fullerton Hotel. haha..!!
but i need to get something to enhance the overall feel of the dress..hahaha..!!

THe "Helen the Baby Fox" dvd. given by dennis. =)

Went for dinner with him. =p

The dinner was surprisingly enjoyable. Had a good chat with him. still love to have conversation with him. cos he's pretty open-minded and can talk anything under the sun. it's the same old him in this area.

but definitely he's more confident. More outstanding now.

Probably it's been a long time since i had a good chat with him. I am feeling very much better now and today.

Really enjoyed my birthday today. =)

Vibrant Blood 2007 in Harbourfront NEL Station on 23rd June

Vibrant Blood - Start Young.

Probably it's still early and the whole drive only started. haha..response was relatively low initially.

These 2 kids are the children of the first donor of today. See the girl on the left? haha..dun know, at one moment, she just suddenly leaned towards me. haha..!

Noticed this was pasted behind every chair of each voluntary donor. Very interesting. Guess this was meant for some mini entertainment for the donors who were going to go for medical screening.

Food..!! For the donors after they had donated their precious blood..!!

This is my friend who was the blood donation drive mascot. haha..we went to Outram and Doby Ghaut mrt station to promote the drive. here, we were taking a short break.

Taken in Doby Ghaut station.

Arg...!! why no one comes to shake hand with me..!! (T_T)

The Sleeping Blood Buddy

The "Break Dance" Blood Buddy

The "Ultrablood" Buddy to the Rescue..!!

Taking photos with kids. The mascot attracted many kids, as well as scaring a small number of them too. hahaha..!

Waving..!! HELLLooOOO..!!

Ever seen a mascot sitting down in the train?

HEllLOoooOO..!! Come donate blood..! Be someone special..!! =D

Another photo shot of Blood Buddy with kids.

Ever seen Blood Buddy take the MRT train?

Haha..here's one.

By the time the mascot team was back to the donation centre, there were many people coming forward to donate blood..!!

Even one of the Vibrant Blood Drive members came forward to donate blood. hahaa..tis is my fren. was rejected the first time when we went to the Blood Bank to donate blood. But this time, he got the chance to donate blood for the first time..!! =D

And you know who is this?
hhaha..Yes, tat's me in the mascot costume.


Thank you..!!!!!!
See ya all in Vibrant Blood 2008..!!

Happy birthday to me..
happy birthday to me..
happy birthday to me.......
happy birthday to me.

wonder how the day will be like.
getting paranoid.

sigh.

Alright, people.

Time to announce my last final stuff which i have long kept from every reader here.

Gotten the letter of acceptance from Singapore College of Traditional Chinese Medicine.

I have been successfully selected to study the course.

Part-time, night course. Starting in mid-july.

The whole course will take me 7 years to complete and graduate.

When i first received the letter, dun know why, i was kinda emotionless. maybe my birthday's coming close, and i can't really force myself to look forward. and also, can't share this good news.

one thing popped up in my mind at that immediate time:

"this is it. More stress."

But definitely i am happy to be selected. this time, i have to work towards my dream. i have lost the opportunity to do well in "A" levels and try getting into medicine course.
This opportunity. It will be my only path to my dream.

Lessons will be conducted in chinese. Words in chinese. Speak in chinese. Even the biological and medical terms will be in chinese. goodness me...i am really nervous.

this time, i wanna do well in this course. Do well like Da Chang Jin. haha..but i dun want to have a difficult life like her.

but dun worry, i will still strive for doing well in my environmental engineering course.

my mum is so super duper conservative. so super narrow minded.

sometimes i can't even start a good conversation on that topic with her.

Yes, had a slight argument with her. basically she is like living in the ancient times. it's really tough to get along with her at times.

sometimes, i really have this urge of wanting to stay in my school hostel. At least could get rid of her unreasonable interrogations.

while i am blogging at this time, she is interrogating me right now. and she is making all the unreasonable assumptions now. keeps saying this....that...

sometimes it's really irritating.

i want to complain, i feel i can't even call to complain to anyone.

sigh. what a day to start for a new day.

Counting down.
I wonder how it will be like. but anyway gotten my that day to be so-called packed with activities. Will be spending almost half the day, helping out in Vibrant Blood. Followed with Uncle Tiu's retirement dinner in st john HQ (HQ again..!!) ...hhaha... knew Uncle Tiu in a duty, find him very grandfather-ly..hope it'll be a good day for me, though i will not be doing anything to celebrate the day.

anyway considered a good day today.
Finally...
1st things first.

my prof replied. and the conversation was more light-heartening and optimistic. so grades will be highly optimistically given.

Second, bought a flat-platorm shoes for only 10 bucks.

Third, bought mascara and blush. Arg..can't believe i will buy them..! will be using them to attend my colleague's wedding dinner. but before that, need to practise..and oh ya..need to buy make-up remover..etc etc..
wonder whether my eyes will really become bigger when put on mascara and eye-liner.....

Fourth, gotten another project from my supervisor. work load's getting more.
Good.
At least can make me forget about things.

yup, tink tat's all..

Oh ya, my mum told me that this morning/afternoon, a pair of birds flew across my house - through the balcony windows, through the living room and dining room and out of the window.
to me, it's a good sight. Cos it's a pair of birds. To me, allow me to firmly assume tat it's a pair of male-female couple birds (not lesbian, or gay couples).
I wonder what this sight is trying to tell me. did think of something, but i am not going to reveal my thoughts here..but for those who know me well, i think they might be able to grasp my thoughts.

juz gotten an early birthday wish from a st-john junior. din really know him, so kinda surprised to get a wish from him. and hahaha..he's the first small boy who will ask me whether i wanna be her elder sister..muahhaa..! and of course, i rejected. i already have 2 youngers brothers..!

haa..

Deleted the first two messages.

not that i feel better.

i did feel better after going to gym to exercise. and i was surprised with what depression can get me to. i perform better than when i am not depressed. my stamina is empowered.

anyway i think i manage to chase one guy away. YEAH..!!!
i think he will not like me.
i am not those typical girls.

anyway i am going to get up myself. me not going for counselling sessions, cos i will expect what they will say..

anyway dun worry about me, people. i will go exercise more and read more motivational books, and read my hymn book more.

haha..taken today in marina square..

photo is kinda blur, cos of my stupid camera which had been brought back from HK. something is wrong with the camera, it juz doesn't feel right..

anyway went to marina square with hm and jac to celebrate jac's birthday..HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JAC..!!! =D

din manage to buy anything..wanting to buy a pair of high heel shoes, which are much higher than my current one..starting to prepare of what to wear for my colleague's wedding dinner.
haa...

went to eat anderson ice cream..very yummy..!! (^-^)

kinda enjoyed myself though din manage to buy anything. =p

probably like what i was given the advice, dun put in 100% love in a person..cos if the other party doesn't love u more than u love the person, the ending will only be hurting urself the most.

anyway now for the good news...

Gotten the first choice for my final year project. will be doing the project with hm.
it's regarding "sequential production of biohydrogen and biomethane from food waste by using a novel phase-separated anaerobic fermentation system".
it's one of my fav profs' project. he's a prof from taiwan and i like him a lot.
he's passionate about environmental conservation, which i am too.
and he's a very caring prof, who remembered to offer a drink packet to a bus driver.
hope this time, me and hm are lucky to get a great prof who will help us all along.

personally, i think as long as both of us are environmentally passionate, he is most willing to help us. hm maybe passive, but it's alrite..! i can be the active person who show passion for saving the environment..!!
if possible, try to build a good relationship with him. and hopefully HOPEFULLY could work under him as a research student, even though some of my results are not good. =p
it's a dream, but hmm..i wanna give a shot. =p

As for my prescribed elective subjects, i have gotten my first two choices too...!!
they are "surface water quality" and "environmental hydraulics". Very happy..!! (^^)
especially when i can get "surface water quality". cos it's going to be a so-called requisite for building one of my dreams.

15th june is a good day. =)

but most importantly, i hope i could get one more thing. once this thing succeeds, my dreams are starting to build up.

and maybe going to be tiring for myself, but i have to press on.

rite now, i finally have dreams. Dreams to work towards them.
it's all credited to Chia Se Project 2006.

Really, if it wasn't for this trip, i wouldn't have found dreams and motivation to work towards..
i dun know whether i can do it, as i have 2 semesters' results which are not good, especially last semester.

anyway people, tell u more when my last thing succeeds.

one very nice song..lyrics are romantic, but a bit impractical - basically i am pretty sceptical about relationship and all now, so kinda mixed feelings towards this song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i1cJ83POi3E

very nice mtv, very touching...love the lyrics and the whole story plot.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xxdfZK0YPxE

and obviously me start to cry again while watching it...i always cry while watching this mtv..

work's not going well for me. probably due to lack of sleep last night, i completely had no energy to think.

surprisingly saw dennis around my house area when i was walking home from the bus-stop.

and i was wearing a pair of shorts and my nerdy specs. (-_-)

be going out with hm and jac. jac's birthday ..!!

shopping for clothes and highly likely for cosmetics..

and as what i expected, my parents started nagging at me wasting money on clothes, and kept saying that whether there is a need to wear so nice.

obviously they seem not to have any idea of the change out there.

Cried the whole night.

Crying for things which served myself right.

probably like what i was told.
just accept the fact and move on.

Ya, i think i just have to live with it.
afterall, it's me who hurt him.

Think dennis'll not be reading this..so i dare to write all these down.

he's really starting to move on with his life. and he's changing.

to someone whom i may not be familiar with.

could be mainly due to my fault. cos i initiated the break-up.

he's really moving on, and is moving even much faster than me.

i have this feeling that he'll be attached soon.

but definitely not to me.
cos i have this strong feeling that i will no longer be in his consideration at all.

i thought i move on.
but now, i feel i am not at all.
i am moving on very slowly.

is it that i dun want to move on?
or i can't find any reason to move on?

of course, i will still feel happy for him when he is attached to a girl who is so much better than me (in terms of looks, brains etc).

I have to feel happy, rite?

Maybe he's already thrown away all the paper cranes and the cross-stitches which i gave to him.

and me?
i am still using the wallet which he gave to me.
i am still using the handphone which he bought for me, when i lost my very first handphone.
i still keep a photo of him in the phone.

and i will often be constantly reminded of his presence whenever anything related to things he likes etc...

so maybe you will ask.
then why in the first place i initiated the whole breakup, and now making myself cry in silence?

well, people.

sigh.

u can never understand.

he's living to the fullest, and he is happy. and he is doing very well in school, and in his social life.
when he is no longer attached to me.

so u get any point?

in my life, happiness always seems to exist to people around me when it doesn't come to me.
probably, this is my life.
a life which i will cry in silence or in pain, in solitude, but my tears could create many happiness for others.

highly emotionally mentally physically affected...

my attachment work's been of ups and downs.

having communication problems with my attachment tutor.
basically he had written a very threatening mail to me and my other frens that we will not be getting any IA (industrial attachment) marks.
luckily he called me after sending his this terrible sounding mail..and frankly speaking, i could not understand what he was saying..i can't really confirm whether he lets us hand in and grade us...

the only thing i could understand was that he said that we had not replied to his most recent mail.
BUT the thing was,
before his most recent mail, i had sent him several mails regarding the submission of report, and there was no reply from him at all..

furthermore, he is on leave now..!!
which means he could only get to read my final report and my evaluation form next week..!!

(T_T)

i am totally stressed up, frustrated, nervous, paranoid, troubled, bothered..

and recently, my stomach is not in a good condition. today it made very weird noise which i dun know whether my colleague sitting diagonally opposite me could hear it. I did not want to be mistaken for something embarassing.
basically, I am feeling sick..ill..
and i need to start to watch out for my diet and lifestyle.

got back my second attachment form from my supervisor. A optimistic one.
=)

I am happy, but i am more worried. worried that i worked so hard for 6 months, and no grade given to me..

(T_T)

I am very sad...

It's my company's inter-department netball game today.

Playing the WD (Wing Defence).
I think i did pretty well during the game, cos i managed to defend the WA (Wing Attack) player pretty well that the other players found difficulties in passing the ball to her.

Later in the next match with another team, i played GD (Goal Defence), a role which i am completely new. But cos i was not very familiar, so din play well, especially the stupid 3-feet gap from my opponent GA (Goal Attack).

Anyway decided to stop playing after the 1st half of this match.

Got a very bad nasty cramps on my right calf. Ended up sitting on the steps of a staircases for pretty long time. Lucky thing i know some first aid. But at that point, i felt the whole scene of me sitting there all alone was kinda pathetic. For a moment, i wish i can call someone who is close to me and to be fetched home.

But then, the pain was so painful that it shifted my attention back to my injury. muahhaha..!!

I wanna change my wallet. Wanna have a more ladylike wallet cos i am still using the one which was given to me.

i think besides having pms, i think i have the high possibility of having periodical depression.
It just comes every month, as and when it likes.

Ya. Basically i cry more often than before. with reasons which i dun wish to state over here.

Industrial Attachment - Extension pending.

pending for confirmed approval for having my IA being extended.

They asked me yesterday.
Initially a little reluctant. Cos will have little time to rest if i were to agree for the extension.
but then again, if my IA was not extended, i surely complain of boredom after resting for about 2 weeks.

so might as well, juz agree to have it extended. Dun know whether will have higher wage, but well, i juz take it as a form of gaining working experience.

also, juz to continue the several projects which i am involved.
one of them is kicking off.

quite a boring day today. and a little depressed. partly could be tat my birthday is coming and i have this feeling that i am going to cry for that day. again. with the same mood.

but anyway me dun care much now. just work and keep working to occupy and push myself to higher limits.

you say i am crazy.
well, i always am.

I am losing myself anyway.

BORed.. (-_-)

I am totally bored.

Even though i had my tuition lesson.

totally bored.

nothing to look forward to.

and being paranoid about people again.

been wondering whether it is true that my fren is trying to ask me to go into MLM line.
cos i am very scared of being used.

writing report is so boring. it's dreadful...n i cannot understand why prof needs to read reports. it's so technical, so lack of human touch.

probably i could make a recommendation on the report, suggesting to replace the report with blog.

ahah..can either sound formal or friendly.
human touch. =)

cool ah?

who knows can even write a poem about ur feelings during the attachment period..

muahhaha..

sian ah...tmr still needs to stay home write my stupid boring technical report, with the neligible amount of human touch.

can't wait for my attachment to end...wannna take a good one-month break..before embarking on a total challenging,stressful journey...

hahaa..

somemore, can SHOP..!!!!!! =D

sometimes, i really miss my old days..
the days when i was in SAC, having fun with my classmates, doing the silly lame acts and dramas, n giving presentations...n when i was very confident about myself. when i really laughed and played.

AhhhhH..the good old days ....

gosh.

i feel old.

(T_T)