hadn't been in a tip-top physical conditions these few days..
probably cos i've cried quite badly on the sunday night once i laid on my bed. been harbouring negative thoughts again, kept feeling that i am being kept at a far distance from him nowadays. probably he's really too busy to bother me and i feel i'm sort of pestering him..but such thoughts were only an one-sided judgement, and i dun dare to ask cos i'm scared to hear any negative truth.

but hmm..i've decided not to cry anymore. i've been in such state for months, and such state has been torturing my physical health for months. my stomach, liver organs are not functioning normally. the next thing i'm worried is my heart. i'm getting worried (or paranoid) that my emotional condition will only get my heart condition worse over time, if i dun do anything.
and studying tcm really puts me in good stead as i am becoming aware of my own health.
so i shall shift my attention to maintaining a well-balanced health.

work load for my ID project is piling up, and in a few weeks' time, exams are coming up. especially my tcm..human anatomy's super lots of things to memorise, but i dun tink the return of the jc-biophobia is back. i'm taking the tcm subjects in an optimistic way. One thing i am very sure of is - God is really amazing.

shifting my focus to my studies..no time to lose anymore..and i really have no more energy to cry anymore..

but definitely i am going to prove to everyone who reads my blog, tat i can manage my these two degrees well.

shall put those guy-girl matters aside for the time being. I just leave this to God's arrangements.