To CECILIA:

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY to YOU..!!!! =D

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To ZHIJIA:

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU...!!!!

HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR DAY TODAY..!!!

=D

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hhaa..din manage to call ZJ when the clock striked 12 last night.. =p i was too exhausted that i turned in pretty early..haha..and zhe told me that she's been waiting for my call last night..!! hahahah..!!! AIYA...!!! ME SO HAPPY to hear that from her..!!!! hahaa...!!!

Din know that my call (and my voice too) is (are) so precious...WHAHAHHA....!!!

it's very sweet of her to tell me that..haha..i feel very touched..and happy..hahaa...

probably it's of a long time since people tell me things which made me feel good about myself...

in fact, i actually wanted to cry a little when ZJ told me that she's actually waiting for my birthday wish call last night...haa..i was very touched...

hhaa..thank you, ZJ..!! for telling me that..!! haha..!! =p

haha..hmm..ok, shall make the effort to call her next year, even if i am super tired..shall tahan all the way to 12 am..hhahaa..!!

think i'm going to start the birthday wish call actions again..feel motivated to do that now..hahhaa...

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sometimes, think the best birthday presents which i wanna receive would be birthday wish call..could still remember the moments when Eileen called, and when the Chia Se 2006 ppl called and sang me the birthday song over the phone..

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suddenly, i feel very happy to study human anatomy...hhaha...

think i will smile the whole day while studying human anatomy..haha..who knows my memory power will level up...!!

whahaa..!!

it really feels good when you can hear your loved ones telling you sincerely how much you are being appreciated... =)

or even a small note...

=)))))

me so happy today....

*******************************************************

feeling better now..

all alone in the lab..very boring...but at least i can control my time and finish my lab work within 2 hours..a sense of accomplishment..

school's pretty interesting today. first, received a SMS from a fren..and first time ever i received a SMS compliment tat i've nice long hair..i was like surprised..and like "wowww...." WHAHAHAHAHA..goodness me...was a little sceptical at the same time, but anyway, ok la..first time my hair's complimented. definitely feel good about the compliment.

hmm..ya, i have beautiful hair..

WHAHAHA...

ok ok, i know you all wanna vomit liao..haha..

second, met a schoolmate in the lab..and the atmosphere was a little awkward..super short conversation..with a bit of that silence of awkwardness..and we were like standing side by side, doing our own washing of lab apparatus..ah..felt very amused though..

and i realise myself that i have another phobia..na..not saying over here..think to you all, it's a ridiculous phobia..

WHAHAHAA..

the recent episodes of 《致父亲母亲》were little upsetting..and one of the incidents reminded me of something..made me wanna cry...

dun know la..sigh.....随缘 随缘 随缘。。。

think i can sleep early tonight..otherwise i'll really wanna try eating panadol for the drowsy effect (if i am really too desperate)..but dun worry, i heard from my Prescribed Elective lecturer saying that panadols actually dun kill, cos one of her clients tried consuming high dosage of panadol to commit suicide and it's not a successful one. hahaa..!!

starting to feel sleepy soon..good...!

hopefully can get a new plan soon..basically i got to wait for my sat's paper to end first..wanna get a sony ecrisson phone..recent samsung phone designs're not very nice..and i hardly see flip-phones nowadays..

S.O.'s recent blog is pretty interesting...

hmmm..so should i be happy that i am single now?
but at least i believe the other party's happy to be single now.
and for this, i am and should be happy for the other party.

haha..like what i've been saying recently..
随缘吧 随缘吧 随缘吧。。。

finally my last paper's over..!!

but din end it well....the paper's pretty challenging..basically i got a moment of blank out in my mind...sigh...and a lot of confusions within my mind when i did the papers...almost wanna broke down in the exam hall..

as i did the papers, on the verge of giving up and breaking down.....

somehow, i feel that's the end of my environmental engineering future...i can't go work in my attachment company...i may even have to submit my destiny to the world of education (though i feel i can do a good job in the teaching world)...

but sigh..it's really very upsetting..n i hate doing papers in the evening..it's the worst condition which i am usually in...and for that instant, i really wanna burst out crying...

but hmm..should i say fortunately...majority of my classmates are having the same problems as me..they find it challenging..! hmm...somehow, i feel a little better..at least, i feel i am not alone.. =p
maybe there might be some serious big moderation.. =p

really hope everything'll go smoothly for me....... =(

for today, i realised that my sch's Channel U Hey! Gorgeous! 校花 took the same Surface Water Quality module as mine..haha..she sat in front of DLY..!! haa..but he told me that she left about 15 mins after the commencement of the papers..
and one thing was, i had never seen her before in the lecture (the lecture room is a small one)..nor during the tutorials...
hmmm...
she is quite pretty to me..sunshine girl feel...but...hmm...

anyway, was glad that exams were over for uni side..now, it's time to study for my tcm's human anatomy..and i realised a few days ago that this course which i am taking is a honour degree..haa.. =p probably now i know why my class's ratio of Singaporean students to China students was almost equivalent, compared to the last few batches..

well...anyway ...

lab and human anatomy...

and i think i need to find plans B, C, D, E etc etc...

sigh.......

juz finished watching the first episode for "Hero" serial drama..haha..pretty nice..the way the arrangement and the visual effect of the furniture in the legal firm is pretty intriguing..i love watching japanese serial dramas..as well as Amercian dramas too..haha..

Starting to love watching C.S.I Miami...nice nice nice..!!!!!

sometimes, i really wonder when our local chinese serial dramas' quality can be further improved...it seems to me that to the local chinese serian dramas, complications are seductions to ..but to me, complications are more of a plain complications intrusion to the human minds..

oki, here's one of the short stories dramas which i find them nice..

check this out:
http://www.rthk.org.hk/rthk/program_archive.cgi?progdir=tv/weareafamily&event_name=%E4%B8%80+%E5%AE%B6+%E4%BA%BA+%0A

hmm...hhaa..basically this is one of short stories dramas produced in Hong Kong..the main theme is family, but such theme is reflected pretty strongly in each different story. it's only one hour, but each story plot is very clear and definitely touching. the actors and the actoresses are brillant in their acting.

so if you are free, do take a look at these episodes. hmm..they are in cantonese but BUT they have chinese subtitles..hahaa.. =p

oki, happy watching..!!

有心无力。

later in the evening, it'll be the last paper for NTU side..can't wait for it to end..but was kinda nervous of what the paper would be like...there's only one past year paper..and it's still a little difficult to predict the style..

sigh..

din really get to study human anatomy for the past few days...starting to get a little worried..this sat's the paper..!! arg..and i still need to go back sch for lab on wed... (T_T) feel like getting a cab to return home from lab on wed...

for some reasons or rather, gotten a little moody right now...think i find it torturing to study for exams...but what to do..? juz have to press on....

probably partly my sch life's going to end soon..and going to embark on a new phase of my life - work life..i never like working..1, cannot skip work as and when you feel like..2, working 9 to 5 is a super bore..3, cannot sleep and wake up late...4, office politics, which is inevitable even if you know how to perform tai-ji..

never been so lost before...used to have very fixed goals in the past..but as for now, hmmm..i am getting worried and paranoid of what job to get, and whether i can get it...and worst of all, i wanna work in my attachment company, but i am very worried about myself when i read one of their requisites "good honour degree" (T_T)....

did try to express my this concern to my parents..and they tried to assure me to be more confident of myself..sigh..but i am only worried about the initial stage..to get selected for the interview and being successfully recruited into the company...
i am not worried about my working capabilities, in fact, i am pretty confident..but it's just that initial step which i am very very worried and extremely paranoid...

i've been through that kind of worrying stage before..admission results for university...attachment results for attachment company...

i'm really very sick of myself going through such stage...it's very mentally torturing...

有心无力。

somehow this feeling's been very strong within me this year...

kena "fly pigeon" by my FYP research student, HB, on thursday.. (T_T) travelled all the way to the west and to the lab..and HB told me tat i've nothing to do for tat day, over the phone..but haha..tink later he recalled that i've once told him before tat i came to sch juz to attend the lab..but luckily, he called to apologise.. :p

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Been having terrible backache and mood swings...arg..!! it's tough to be a woman.. (T_T)

but felt better later in the night...

but somehow or rather, i just have no idea..there's a vinegar pot within me..

maybe cos i'm a cancerian ba...hhaa..hmmm.. =p

but hmmmm...never mind about my feelings now ba..dun tink they're of an issue..

i just have to learn to let things go as normally..

随缘吧。。。

********************************************************************************

feel funny to study surface water quality...feel like quite fast to finish it up, which is not feeling very secure...

really wonder what to do after my exams..though i have things to do..but...maybe i should take some initiatives to meet up friends ba..hmmmmmm...aiya..dun know la..

recently been watching this korean drama 《致父亲母亲》over Channel U..love this drama a lot..it's pretty educational, in fact..it has a strong and clear theme of family and other kind of relationships..and haa..my favourite character's the father..hhaa..he's very calm and peaceful..there's a certain charisma which kinda attracts me..though i am aware tat he's very old..haha..but i like his smile and his eyes..!! hah..

wanna know who's this father? hhahaa..go watch Channel U...monday to friday at 7pm...hee.. =p

Finally....!! Down with Human Resources Management..!!! YES..!!!
Though the paper's not done very well..basically, i'm not motivated to write good quality answers..i just find the whole paper to be very super stupid...

and haha..saw my FYP research student, HB, in the examination hall..he's one of the invigilators for my papers today..and i'm sitting pretty in front of him.. (o_O) felt super stressed up, especially when he paused for a moment at my table...*GRASP*

i hope he'll not invigilate next week's surface water quality...he aced for that paper, and i will feel pressurised if he were to invigilate this paper and he happened to look at my answers during the exams.. =x

Steamboat for dinner today..! yeah..! to celebrate one of my family members' birthdays..! haha..and this was the first time when my brothers and i had to sing the birthday songs of three different languages (mandarin, english and cantonese) for so many times...basically, NG a lot of times...whahhaa...but it's fun to sing the songs for so many times...hahahahah...!!

start writing my post-exams-to-do agenda...realise a lot of things to do and catch up..haha..and my dad even told me not to lose hong-kongers' face..cos hong-kongers have one common outstanding characteristic - they dun like to lose out to others(that's what my dad told me)..

and haha..well, i may be a full-pledged offical Singaporean now and I am very proud to be a Singaporean, but afterall..I was born in Hong Kong, and i still carry the blood of Hong Kong..hmm..so..hhaha..hahahahahhahahaha..

Yup.

=p

Arg..still got to go sch later for lab...sigh...long journey.........................

but at least i feel more motivated now to study..! surface water quality and HUMAN ANATOMY...!!!!

Going to study the whole book of human anatomy without any help from any assessment book..wanna test how strong is my memory.. =p

and oh Ya..! a piece of good news..!! haha..
my application for postponement of taking TCM basic theory exam has been successfully approved..!! which means i will not get a 60 marks even if i were to do very well for the papers..! yeah yeah..! i was so happy when the office informed me yesterday, so happy that i kept smiling and skipping my way out of the office..! hahaha..till now, i'm still very happy...!! hahaa..

hhhaa..ZJ's been dreaming of me recently...whahahhahaha..find it a little funny..hahaha..but really wonder what i was doing in her dreams...hopefully it's a good one..hahahhahaa..!!!! =p

Studying HRM's a total torture.. (T_T)

simply dislike studying for the sake of exams..all the stupid theories...

Mood's completely destroyed by the whole HRM stuff.. =(

ARGGGG....

stupid stupid HRM....ARG..!

Then also kena "fly pigeon"...sigh..never mind...

Looking at the HRM notes makes me wanna cry...

sigh..can't sleep again now...think i shall sleep in the living room again..sigh...

sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian sian.................

everyone's super busy with preparing exams...

sigh....

feeling very nasty, especially when i realised i'm being "fly pigeon" juz now..arg..never mind...

sometimes i really dislike studying for exams..it's a stupid process which everyone, including myself, blindly experience this whole process..for like a decade of my current age?

sometimes, i really hate talking to myself.
and right now, i am here, blogging and talking to myself..rattering all my complaints..forcing readers to read my complaints, and putting up with me...

i can't wait to study surface water quality and human anatomy on wed.
at least i see some purposes in studying.

HRM? arg..!
it has to be put into practice..! why do we have to study as a theorical module? why can't it be like Professional Communication? So does it mean that a person who gets an theorically 'A' for HRM is highly proficient in handling human relations in the working society? NOT ALL THE TIME..!

ARG..! I'm totally frustrated with this module..! Right now..!

and i can't go jogging now..it's 3 am now.. (-_-)

Later in the evening, still have to attend my last human anatomy lecture..ARG..! in fact, i dun really wanna attend, but i feel guilty of keep getting WM to sign for me, and me holding an appointment in tat sch have to resort to such means,which is not reflecting well of my personalties and i'm not setting a good example to my classmates...

ARG..! I wanna quit holding tat appointment..!

not going for the FM933 DJ's solo threatrical performance..
shall spend more time with my family..and focus on the more important stuffs in my post-examination agenda.

Think i'm feeling a little better now...but i'm still not sleepy..! ARG..!

Can't make myself cry to sleep..basically it's difficult to do tat these few days, which is puzzling me for an instant. tried to do tat last night, but it wasn't very successful..

been under big stress, yet low morale these few days..when i'm studying HRM...

oki, got to force myself to sleep now.

NItez.

Been having unhealthy sleeping habits..i can't get to fall asleep easily, ever since the study week.. (T_T)

and studying HRM's a total dread. Super boring topic...and i can't even dream of HRM, unlike what i've been under tat kind of situation when i'm studying Environmental Hydraulics..

and i miss the job application closing to apply for job in my attachment company..! ARG..!
and right now, my parents are getting nervous for me.. (T_T) i'm anxious too..!!

sigh..dun know la..

starting to develop physical test anxiety syndrome...backache..running nose...ARGGGGGG....!!!!!

My jogging stamina's deteriorated badly..ARGGGGG......!!!!!!

ARGGG.......

studying human resources management (HRM) is boring.......

BORINGGG..................

hhaa.. =p

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oki, today's Halim's birthday..! Happy Birthday to you, Buddy Halim..! haha..

WoooOo..a lot of people having their birthdays this month..

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sigh..i'm getting bored of studying HRM...

First day of exam...is OVER...!!!

phew...off with Environmental hydraulics...finally...!

Had quite a terrible night before the day of the exam..test anxiety...hhaa..

well, next to go - human resources management...
memorising..memorising...

o_O

think gotten too tired, and the journey's long, din manage to attend today's human anatomy lecture... =p
but i'm really glad that i've a great classmate -WM. She's been very helpful and generous. would help me sign attendance when i can't attend due to school committment..haha..oops.. =p

recently been having numerous self-talk..tink i dun wanna talk to anyone, dun wanna disturb anyone..from their studies..blab blab blab.... (-_-)

arg..!! din know that "The Pillowman" is out..! Happened to come across its advertisemnt over the TV..arg..should have watched that channel more often..and now the tickets are almost sold out..and i can't simply go for next sat's martinee. surface water quality exam after the next week. ARG..!
Sigh, juz got to wait for next time...

sometimes i dun know why i start going for all these shows.....

sigh..probably tink i've to arrange some activities for myself, instead of stucking myself at home, thinking of stuff which can never be happening..haa..

and somehow, for an instant, i dun know what's going on with my life..it's been a year..how time flies..

ha..sigh..ya..

AH... WELLLLL..........

oki, shall stop here for today..or i start rattering pessimistic stuff over here, and start complaining...

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a lighter tone for now..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, YS...!!!! hahaa...(dun know whether u r reading it,but anyway HAPPY BIRTHDAY...!!!)

=D

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"Hero" and "Ugly Betty" are nice..The opening episode for "Hero" displays smooth transition of the introduction of each character. Suspense is built up at a comfortable and smooth pace..nice.. =)

Been reading this book's "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho..

Find this paragraph pretty inspiring and optimistic:

'"No,"the alchemist answered. "What you still need to know is this: before a dream is realized, the Soul of the World tests everything that was learned along the way. It does this not because it is evil, but so that we can, in addition to realizing our dreams, master the lessons we've learned as we've moved toward that dream. That's the point at which, as we say in the language of the desert, one 'dies of thirst just when the palm trees have appeared on the horizon.'

"Every search begins with the beginner's luck. And every search ends with the victor's being severely tested."'

think i'm too stressed up recently..been reading this book for some spiritual inspiration and some formulae-getaways..spending my sleeps in the living room..and dreaming of hydraulics formulae at nights..dreaming of talking soft-toys...having the same nightmare...!

ARG...!

two more days to my very first paper - environmental hydraulics....

AH.............!!!

Getting kinda nervous...!!

anyway ... i've decided to watch this threatrial performance "First Intimate Contact" <<第一次亲密接触>>.. basically, it's a monologue (in mandrian) performed sololy by our Singapore Radio Station Yes933 FM's DJ - Dennis Chou..

According to Wikipedia.com, a monologue is "is a speech made by one person speaking his or her thoughts aloud or directly addressing a reader, audience, or character".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monologue:

"In a monologue in a play or film, the speaking actor need not be alone on the stage or scene; however, none of the supporting cast (in theatre or film) speaks.

There are two basic types of monologues in drama:

1) Exterior monologue: This is where the actor speaks to another person who is not in the performance space or to the audience.

2) Interior monologue: This is where the actor speaks as if to himself or herself. It is introspective and reveals the inner motives to the audience. This is also a common device in stream of consciousness writings. Frequently in modern theatre, the actor may deliver the monologue in an "aside" (or a sequence of asides).

Where the character delivering the monologue is alone on stage it may also be described as a 'soliloquy'. Writers such as Shakespeare used the soliloquy to great effect in order to express some of the personal thoughts and emotions of characters without specifically resorting to third-person narration.

It is a dramatic convention that soliloquies and asides cannot be heard or noticed by the other characters, even if they are delivered in their plain view.
A written monologue may contain stage directions for the performer, and might be preceded by information about the monologue's setting. (For example, Samuel Beckett's monologue, Krapp's Last Tape).

The monologue was a significant feature of French classical drama; the monologues of Racine have been highly prized by French actresses, including Rachel and Sarah Bernhardt.
The dramatic monologue is a poetic form not to be confused with the monologue in drama. It was brought to a high standard by Robert Browning. The form is such wherein the poet writes from a speaker's point of view in the form of an address to a listener who does not respond in the poem. The speaker in the poem generally talks about a subject, but inadvertently reveals something about their character. It gives the poet an opportunity to present his subject in direct 'conversation' with the reader (e.g. Browning's Porphyria's Lover) or places the reader as a 'character' to whom the monologist speaks (e.g. the same poet's Mr. Sludge the Medium or My Last Duchess). Such poetry combines the dramatic impact of the stage monologue with the potential of more elaborate and suggestive use of language; on the printed page, where the words can be re-read and pondered, there is the potential to evoke more complex layers of intent and meaning. "

"First Intimate Contact" is based on an adaptation from an internet novelist Cai Zhi Heng's "FIrst Intimate Contact"..

Synopsis:

Usually shy and reserved when it comes to love and relationships, ‘Pizi Cai’ meets a mysterious and intriguing young girl nicknamed ‘Flying Dance’ on the Internet.What started out as something just for fun developed into frequent late-night online chats, and eventually a decision to finally meet up personally.Will this first meeting turn out to be a pleasant surprise, an everlasting regret, or perhaps…?

heard that the comments from past performance of this title were positive..

hmmm..but it seems to me that the story line and its themes are very ordinary, and kinda dull...(haa..cos i dun really like theme of romance..)

but what makes me wanna take the risk to spend my hard-earned $28 on this show, is that this is a monologue. and i'm very interested to know how it's being presented...and also, since it's going to be shown from 19th to 22nd Dec, so i could go watch..! haa....

so, most likely will be getting the ticket after this thursday's paper..and there'll be 20% early bird discount if i were to purchase it within this week...!!

But not going to let my parents know about it..one, they'll think it's a waste of money..second, my mum'll think tat i'll be watching with some guy anonymous to her (which is like...no...i'll be most likely watching it alone..)...third, they'll hardly believe that i'll like such activity...

i love to watch threatrical dramas..and such influence has to be credited to Arthur Miller's "The Crucible" which i studied for English Literature (but this is an American literature, if i'm not wrong) in my sec sch days..

Love Arthur Miller's threatrical works..One of his famous works are "Death of a Salesman"..

But what i'm more interested in his threatrical works are "The Crucible" and "After the Fall"..

"After the Fall" was a coincidence..i read this play during my first three months in TPJC's library..and i simply love of how the play was presented...the plot was taken place in the protagonist's mind..and how the characters related to the protagonist were positioned in his "mind" was brillantly designed and presented...however, this play was not a very popular one, partly due to the unconventional stage settings...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/After_the_Fall_%28play%29

i really hope this play will be presented again....

So anyone has any news of Arthur Miller's plays which are going to be shown locally, do inform me....!!!!

or if there's any more monologue, do inform me too..!!!

THANK YOU..!!! MERCI MERCI MERCI...!!!!

=D

Finally, all end well..!! hahha...all my tuition works had finally stopped...yeah..................!!!!

haa..feel happy when two of my students asked me whether i could teach their siblings next year...hhaa..

but will be increasing my tuition rate next year...think i could only take 2 students, for the maximum...next year'll be a even more hectic year for me, and my responsibilities at home will be even carrying more weights next year...why..? hmm..hee..sorry, not convenient to reveal over here..

tink i'll continue to teach tuition..dun wan to rely upon my parents for my miscellaneous spenditures..and definitely work as much as possible now..

but gonna miss all my three students -CX, JY and WC..
All of them have been under my guidance for two years..and i've seen them grown..and definitely this batch has been very interactive, as in that they are pretty comfortable with me teaching them..think partly cos i hardly give them any homework..hahaha.. =p

but one big common thing which i see in them is - i see potientials in all of them..i feel they can have great life accomplishments in the future..hahahhahaha...

=p

oki, going back to my studies now..

feeling very bored..of all the studies..

realised that there are so many things to read up..environmental hydraulics, surface water quality...human anatomy.... (T_T)

maybe gotten kinda affected by the test results...sometimes really feel like giving up...

sigh......................................................................

sometimes get really affected by what kind of job i'll be able to get...the only job which i dun wan to get currently is as a teacher...not at this time..dun wan to be tied down by the responsibilities of education so soon...

u may say..as a tcm practioner..hmm..tat'll be like 7 yrs plus later? besides tat, i'm not intending to open a clinic immediately after my tcm degree graduation..i wanna work as a volunteer in my sch's hospital first, to accumulate more medical experiences...

sigh...................................................

i'm really bored....bored of all the stupid notes......i miss literature...at least i could read the subject like a story book...and say the quotes like a drama actress...hahaa..

and i'm bored of hearing my parents keep telling me tat i must know how to do this, how to do tat..so that in the future i will not have many problems with my husband..but what's the whole point now?!.....how to have a husband when i'm not even attached...?! of course, you may say juz in case..to prepare myself...

ahhhh...craps la.........

sigh...but i'm really bored now.....

play sim city4 as a form of my resting period...i even watched a quarter of "Forrest Gump" movie...haha..i love the first part of the movie..love the opening music...love the filmography...love how the plot's carried out...love the oldies which have been selected for different scenes...n i realise what could be the possible reasons of putting the scene to be in Alabama...if i'm not wrong, it's one town where there used to have quite a serious racial discrimination...the history's somewhat related to what i've studied before in "To Kill a Mockingbird"...

but i'm really really very bored noww.......................................................!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..........

i dislike studying for the sake of examinations...if it's for tests, i could still accept it partially..hhaa....

sian sian sian sian sian sian sian....

can't wait for exams to be over...but then again...got nothing much to do after exams..besides going to sch for lab....
still deciding whether i should go for a volunteer camp...

ah....crap crap crap crap crap.............. (-_-)

tada...!! this is the teddy bear which one of my students gave to me as a farewell gift..

got a surprise when her younger sister passed this to me..hahaa..like my this student a lot..though she's a Normal Academic student, she's a very cheerful and cute personality. She's hardworking too, basically she has a positive learning attitude..which reflects a totally different perspective of what a NA student acts like.

Love this teddy bear a lot...though it feels a little funny to have received such gift at an age like this..but still.. =) found it very sweet..!!

hhaa..so...though i was still very sick at that time, still wanna took a few shots of the bear with my hamtaro...haha.. =p

This is the nerd version of the teddy bear..looks a bit like me..eyes small small..look nerd nerd..but still look so cute..

hahhahaa..ok..i hear vomiting...

together...we shall look far..........................

The Nerd and the Cute
hahaha...

Tada..!!

oki, some lame photos of them...
This'll happen when i study too much...

This'll happen when desperation calls....get a book stacked on top of my head..hoping the info will automatically go into my brain..

Look at Hamtaro's face...she's so happy when the book's stacked onto her...

haha..this's what happen when i fall sick...

*********************************************************

Oki, forget about my blabbering last night...really depressed over the results...it's my last year and i'm still not doing fine...

maybe i keep feeling i'm getting old soon....so get very worried about the future...worry this worry that..as if i'm going to die in a few days' time.. =p

but maybe a different life stage is going to take place soon..and i'm getting nervous about how the future will be like...

i even get worried whether i can get married or something like that...!! hahhaha..me quite dumb la... =p na....i'm jus being paranoid...

hopefully the examinations will go smoothly for me...and really hope i can create some miracles or something like tat...

i'm not very scared about my human anatomy, in fact...think tat kinda bio-phobia's been overcome..adopting one or two supermemory techniques kinda work for me..i can still remember what i've memorised a few days ago..!

if only i would have known how to master such skills in JC, maybe there's still hope for me to do well in my 'A' levels results...and maybe still hold hopes of getting into the medical faculty..and maybe i'll not be so inferior of myself...

Think i'm a late-bloomer....always slow in grabbing things well at first...

Probably tat's why i know i'm a late bloomer, i've been very worried that the society waits for no late bloomer and i've to take longer time than anyone...

*****************************************************

Get to know something...sigh...

人心难测啊。。。。

tink i'm feeling better...

and yup, thank u for the encouragement...

tink i'm very easily cheered up...

but then again...still kinda worried...no matter what...

probably i really have to be very patient..
true winner is always the last to laugh...hope i am...

being da chang jin is tough...have to go through a lot of hardships...

and i'm told that my life's to go through a lot of hardships, juz to achieve success...
do i have to.......??? why can't i juz have some smooth-sailing paths....?

sigh...juz have to try my best at the time being..as i'm told, dun worry so much now..worry after tat...

trying to upload some photos here...but dun know what's wrong with the technical stuff...wanna show u all something which i was given as a gift by one of my students.......

Gotten my second environmental hydraulics test results this afternoon...din manage to pass the paper when i thought i could pass it off....

very depressed...i already had a gut feeling that i did not manage to pass the second surface water quality test as well (tat paper's kinda out of my expectation)...sigh...

suddenly feel very useless of myself...can't do anything well at all...

that test, according to the lecturer, was done well overall...
again...i'm the odd one out...
still remembered the 'A' Level results for my biology, i was the one of the few in the cohot to get a C, whereas majority's gotten a A...

i feel very terrible..examinations in one week's time..sulked the whole journey home juz now..

feeling very terrible...

sometimes, i really feel i've made the right choice of making the incident to happen..look at my grades...look at myself...not suitable at all...

i tink i shall not dream anymore positive things...i see no point in dreaming when these things are so far away from me..

anyway my cold's getting better...think that's how i got to rest before embarking for the examinations...

gotten very sick..though my nose's marathon's stopped..

feeling very drowsy and giddy the whole day, especially after lunch..ended up postponing my tuition work to tomorrow..need to force myself to teach tomorrow, by hook or by crook...

till now, still feeling very giddy as if i'm going to faint anytime.. =( though have taken quite a long nap...
and my mum started her nagging...nagged that i din get enough rest and eat enough...

i decide to quit my TCM student union position as an assistant welfare officer..my welfare officer called juz now to tell me that there's a chalet bbq tmr, and both of us are to be in-charge of it. which means i have to go tmr..
my examinations are coming very soon..no way i can compromise anymore..so i told her straight that i can't help her for tmr's event..
too many things at hand, and i see no point in holding this position when i cannot fulfill this responsibility efficiently..will only make me look even more irresponsible..

shall hand in my resignation letter later, when i go for my tcm lesson.

i really cannot take it anymore.....

caught a nasty terrible running nose...

feeling very drowsy the whole day..affecting my study's performance... (T_T)

hope can get well by tomorrow..
still have a tuition work to teach tmr and tcm lesson to attend tmr...

(T_T)

gonna go now...too tired to write more, n definitely not much mood to think of things...

*had a nightmare again..and it's telling me the same few things again...sigh...i really dun know how true was the nightmare..n i reallu have no guts to ask, cos sometimes truth hurts..so i guess i juz wanna keep myself in the dark..*

fatigue...

human anatomy's getting harder...my prof's words're getting more and more confused..and i'm starting to find difficulties in catching up..furthermore, it seems that some of my classmates have studied through, which tat makes me even more stressed up..

so many medical terms..!! especially all the neurons..all the axons...all the different nervous system medical terms... (T_T)

need to get myself focus now...

sometimes i feel weird whenever i log in msn..realise i'm always taking the initiative..feel a bit thick-skinned..but hmm..a bit confused at times la...aiya..dun know how to describe how i feel about this too...

still, no wonder what, i gotta make myself focus on my upcoming exams... exam sitting arrangements are out, and tat makes me very nervous, cos it implies tat exams are coming very very SOON....

=s

very scared....

oki, gonna go back to appreciate the art of human body structure...





*Many times, when i am studying human anatomy, i am amazed with how complicating yet organised a simple human body is...probably tis's the reason of why Leonardo da Vinci was fascinated by the human body structure..*

*i still wanna go Andoung, Cambodia...*

*Old Mantou's heart smiled and laughed.
My facial muscles are the one performing this function while my heart does the talking and listening.*

din do very well for my integrated design presentation..
basically gotten myself freaked out..n my face turned green with nervousness..
but partly cos i din eat the whole day, and sleep late last night..

=p

i dun tink i can go on extreme diet..like not eating the whole day..got myself hungry and worst of all, my face'll turn green, which is very very unhealthy..

sometimes i start to feel why i have to go through all these..juz to get myself slim down..often i envy those ladies who can eat all they want n yet won't get fat..
and definitely i cannot waste food by not finishing whatever is given to me, juz cos i wanna lose weight..to me, it'll be like not appreciating the food, and the blessing which i am given.

but definitely i am very disappointed with myself, cos i know i can do better than today's performance...

thank goodness, my tuition's cancelled today..gotten a very bad headache after the whole presentation.... (T_T)
i hate headaches...n definitely i hate taking medicine..even if it's chinese medical pills... =(
taking medicine makes me feel sick.

wanna go for the study visit to cambodia which my integrated design prof had proposed to organise...can go visit the exact hygiene centre which my sch had built for the Cambodian's Andoung people.!! i only hope that the travelling dates will not clash with my TCM exams.. =s
please please, let me go..!!!

but funny thing is ...my parents never object to me going for this trip..hahaha...surprisingly..!!haha..so happy..probably they feel i've taken care of myself well in vietnam trip (though i gotten a bad cough..n i can't eat the delicious big vietnamese spring roll..!)

but really hope i can go...

definitely through this project, i learn that working experiences are very important if were to do a successful project as such..a lot of parameters to consider and it's very difficult to do this, do that..calculate this...calculate that...
so this means that one of my dreams need to wait...

definitely learnt a lot about myself in this project...my bad points especially... =p
still find it's been a fruitful experience when i really get to work together with YS they all..

started to get a little worried about my future..a little scared tat i'll get a second lower or third class honour..my sch's been a very competitive one..
wanna get a job which allows me to interact with people, do presentations..and travel overseas to meet different people...with high salary..n i can travel...n i can get to train myself to talk more and well...

probably sometimes, i find the life here's been a bore..no big special national occasion (let's not say National day)..and the pace here is fast...

so when i am going back hong kong for my graduation trip, i wanna go see those peaceful protests there..something like the protests carried out in the Queen Pearl Harbour (i think tat's the name of tat harbour =p )....



Juz some inner thoughts...

*sometimes i really wish i could own a siberian husky for myself..but i need to wait...wait to get a high-salary job, so that i can get a apartment for myself, and use my own money and ability to get my first siberian husky..i even have thought of the name for the husky.. (^^) it's a name which i find most suitable for my husky..

_ _ _ _ _ _ (go figure..haha..)

tat's the name...meaning that this husky's a gift from God and he'll protect me always.. =)

really can't wait for this day to come..cos i wanna tell u all what his name is about..!!*


*i really wanna go cambodia........*