Thursday, September 06, 2007

been very busy and tired.

been trying to doing some pyscho-ing onto myself. i dun know la...some bad feelings are coming up onto me again..bad feelings..so bad tat many times, i just have the urge to cry. but like all of u have been trying to drill things into my head - life goes on......

sigh...

i can't recall any happy things now...so can't blog any happy stuff now..

surface water quality and environmental hydraulics modules are starting to get harder and their tests are around the corner...my final year project is starting to have more tests to be done daily...Integrated Design starts to have many design planning, research, calculations and considerations...human anatomy knowledge is starting to pile up...

once again, i'm starting to question my own self-worth...and i start to do many self-reflections, but at many times i just couldn't get the answer.

and i am starting to become forgetful...but of all things, i can't make myself forget something which i wish to forget at times. strange, rite?

just all these are enough

i only know my life's like a mess with me trying to put them in order and calmness.

all cos of one decision which i have made, which seems to change my life completely different.

i'm starting to detest it, but i have to live with it, and bear with it.
it's a responsibilty which i have to carry for life.

What i can do now, is to improve myself to be more firm in saying "no" to certain things, and be more firm in what i actually want in a guy and in a relationship.

i dun want to make a second such mistake (to have my beliefs be shaken loosely by a third party).
Such mistake, such lesson, is too much to bear for the second time.

1 comment:

Xiao Ling said...

After Rain shine will come..... not to worry so much!!! i will not drill any thought into u but i just wanna say i'm just a phone call away!!!

xiao ling!