Didn't have an excellent xmas morning to start off..went to golf course with AG and his 2 other guy friends..i have all sorts of terrible shots, my mood was highly affected by all the basic hits i couldn't achieve unlike those which i hit at the range..it was horrible..i got pissed off and i started pulling long faces throughout the whole course.

Seriously it wasn't me ..and i have to admit that i did not manage my emotions well enough..i was so affected that i couldn't hide the expressions..i felt very left alone during the entire course..i knew at that moment, i needed to be independent but i could not control myself feeling very lonely and un-motivated. it's a terrible 2 hours which i had to go through myself. 2 hours of no one motivating me, telling me that it's alright...and many times i can feel very strongly that his 2 friends were mocking or doubting me behind my back..

it was an extremely terrible feeling. i felt like crying but i had to control cos i had already expressed my frustration on my face.

all i knew that i was extremely lonely and just wished for a caring and understanding heart towards my terrible shots...but i guess i need to take this experience as a training for myself that i need to be more independent in managing my own emotions..

anyway i decide that for the time being, i shall not join them..and i guess they wouldn't want me to join in given my performance today..so i just gonna give myself time to practise more and hit the golf course myself to learn to manage the stress. once i am ready, i can just kick the guys' ass and show them that i am not that terrible as they will think of.

i really hate to lose in a un-glam manner.

Had a xmas gathering with ZJ they all..love all the presents which I receive this year!!

Upon self-reflection, i decide to have a resolution for year 2011 - improve on my social skills. To speak kinder words (i realise i've been rather critical in my words when i open my mouth to talk), to practise my smile (i realise i've this habit of wanting to smile and yet not smiling, it feels almost like a fake smile which will give the incorrect message to others), and to learn to have fun (i realise i'm too serious).

half day tomorrow, yeah~! =D

It's a sad post.

Hmmm...realise that i feel i am not ready, still..i'm not ready to travel overseas with AG..to me, it's like one big milestone in the relationship..AG's not ready for marriage and seems not to believe in one, so i am kinda afraid that if things didn't turn out well, i will feel ...i don't know..i only feel loss of faith..

went to seek the divine advice..

well, asks me to be at ease and peace without bothering for change, asks me to be patient and my success will come eventually..

shall take the advice at the moment. Well at least i feel more peace with myself...

finally i have done the xmas shopping spree for the s5 girls xmas gathering and my colleagues' xmas celebration! hmm..think this time, the gifts should be better than last year's..haha..

had a good evening outing with myself just now. hang around at tamp's starbucks, watching shows, drinking coffee..basically slacking around with my favourite coffee brand. =)

feel a lot better now...

just got my clinical attachment schedule for the new semester..yeah!! my first mentor is my favourite mentor for the internal medicine module. he is extremely good..every time there is always a long queue of patients and i always get to learn many cases from him..trying to pick up his thread of thoughts during his diagnosis and medicine prescription, etc..i even recommend to my mum and she even compliments for the effectiveness of the medicine prescribed to her. i'm glad to hear that.

I inspire to be like this mentor in the future..this is my life goal =)

Mood was not fantastic today..was so upset by the same hiccup that i kinda teared in front of my parents..but can't really tell them cos they will just give me all sorts of reasons to make me change my mind.

I am not happy but what can i do.

Work today was not easy for me. All i can say here - haiz.

right now, i need to remind myself that i have a team of officers who have not been promoted for many years and the important items for my technical officer and me is to brainstorm on how to create value in their work, to be recognised for their work and to be on constant motivation to improve themselves.

of course, it's easier to talk here than to take action. i need to push myself constantly to walk the talk.

a mini xmas celebration party organised by my colleagues..think my angel was not very happy with the gifts i got for him/her.. sigh...but i guess i dun know him/her well, so din manage to get a good gift.. i feel kinda disappointed with myself.

can't wait to meet ZJ they all for xmas gathering..always enjoy being with them..it feels very comfortable being with them.

Met AG's 2 more frens..realise and kinda confirm myself that i really have a very awkward social skills. i can't talk!!!!!! i will just keep rather quiet, VERY ZEN (being sarcastic of myself here) and if i talk, i tend to sound kinda serious and egotistic in a way. and when i talked to the guys' lady friend whom we met at the restaurant, i realise i am different..i can't connect the frequency and i'm feeling like some sort of a nerd or freak or i dun know!!! but then again, i am frank with what i say. so..hmmm..ya..i can't joke..i'm not comfortable. but anyway i just be what i am. I am a satisfied loner, so be it. i like hanging out with my usual lady frens (the s5 girls, the ntu clique), and i am happy with that.

realise that AG is that one man who can make me feel very comfortable being with him.

Hmm..felt a lot better after crying out hard tat night. it's good wake-up call. i'm picking myself up again. and interestingly, i can't stay moody with AG around..i can just forget about my worry..he has his ways to cheer me up without doing anything deliberate.

But something worries me a little..not long ago he told me that there is no point in marriage. i was like (O_O)...please God, don't let me walk this terrible path again...this can really hurt me..

so which means, i am, again, taking a risk. i just have to put my faith in God.

Been reading "The Picture of Dorian Gray" by Oscar Wilde the second time. Love this book. So many interesting philosophical quotes and meanings.

I finally break down. Receive all my exams results. din do well in all the modules. very very disappointed with myself, kept crying away.

Who to blame? I can only blame myself.

All i can think of now is put more efforts in next semester. i have to say i've too many other commitment this semester. i will just listen to my own heart, study what i need to learn, don't study for the sake of exams. don't follow the rest to study for the sake of exams. This method has proven not effective for you. You did worse than before.

i am in my 4th year..i can't afford myself to deteriorate in my studies =(

I'm very exhausted now..my eyes feel heavy and swollen...

En fin...my exams are over!!! woooo..

not very excited over it..cos i am not very excited about next semester's class schedule. 5 important modules plus weekly clinical attachment sessions. How am I going to manage? I am already trying hard to refresh my knowledge for the past years' modules. all are essential for the license examination. it's like going for some beijing capital examination - once fail one module, you fail the entire examination, and you can come back to take the exam next year.

Work today was quite amusing, hmm well only to me, i guess.

my boss is back and I had quite an intensive short discussion with her over the phone for an assumingly urgent matter. both of us sounded rather impatient/urgent/anxious with each other and the conversation, after some thoughts, is rather amusing to me. it feels like i had a minor working conflict with my boss, but i kinda embrace such conflict and am looking at it optimistically. conflicts open up frank conversation, which i like that.

talking about frankness in work, i remembered giving a negative feedback to my director about an internal training trial, seriously i dun know where's the courage, i only know that i will give my honest feedback if i really want the trial to be successful. i am taking a risk. a foolish risk, it's possible.

anyway last week i actually told my division boss about my next development progression, took the opportunity to let him know my interest of where i wanna move on next..i mean since he asked..of course i wanna let him know my interest otherwise i may lose the chance..well, see how it goes. keeping my finger crossed cos it may be another foolish risk i took.

last paper tomorrow. Wooh!! i can't wait!

one paper down, 3 more to go. i am already feeling insane right now.

going back office in the morning, and a half day leave in the afternoon. same as for Friday.

all i can feel right now is that - i need a change. A big change. and i need to take action to make that change. i am feeling the nuttiness in me.. such feeling is like some sort regular hiccups. it's killing my mind everytime the hiccup perks.

but then i still need to wait. and remind myself to be on a constant lookout.

Taking a break from the studying now..feeling kind saturated and un-motivated to study..

Don't know why - it seems that i am taking this round of exams in a more relaxed and controlled manner..think i've studied the exam questions earlier on, feel more prepared. But i'm not confident of scoring high. Don't know why.

on my lookout again. haha..but will wait.

My leave starts tomorrow. And I still have endless work to do.. sigh.. =(

I really wish for a good weekend getaway, and just do nothing. Just relax and really take a good breather.

Recently I feel I have been pushing too hard on my officer..feel that it is not very good of me. I need to let my officer take a good rest before the new year kicks in.

********************************************************************

Anyway it was AG's birthday on Tuesday =) brought him to Melt the World Cafe..glad he likes it and glad he likes the mug i get for him =)

I feel i'm running out of time. I need more time to prepare for my exams..i feel so screwed up.. =(

eventually din get to give the presentation, i hurrayed for it, but later then i realise that i need to send the ppt slides..sigh..

i am starting to feel inadequate in my studies. i need more time..i need to be more focused..

many times i harbour that thought, but i know i can't do that.. =(

i'm starting to feel i'm losing control of my time. i start to hope that a day will have more than 24 hrs..so that i can have more time to focus on my studies and take a good rest. =(

i think i need to get that book "pursuit of happyness" to get the motivation on how he can manage his internship and the stress level he had to face during that period.

it's work performance review period. initially i thought there's some improvement in my performance, after thinking through, nah, i dun think i've improved. i feel i need more practical courses to feel more confident and assured at work.

i want to take a good break, i want to go overseas to relax, but the thought of it sometimes stresses me up, cos i need to inform my parents of whom i am going with..and to go overseas with AG, it is a question mark..and imagining that i can't go, makes me feel myself being a lousy gf..from time to time, i keep feeling that it is because of me, myself, to cause another relationship failure. i did think about this before, and i tell myself if tat day really comes, i just have to live with it that i'm not a keeper, so just keep myself single and focus on studies and work. i dun know why i am feeling like this right now, could be the emotional hormone in me. anyway it's not shameful to be single, i will not die without a marriage, i can still plan my retirement plan as what i wish to - to be the cutiest old lady in the old folks' home, sneak out of the home and make the nurses running around the island to look for me. haha.

ok, this is so crappy.

all i want to say - i need more time and energy.

Short Trip to San Francisco

Haa..here I am..finally have some time to share with you my business trip to the states.

So after my conference, i extended one more day to have my own private trip to San Francisco. Din dare to extend my private trips any longer as my boss left the states one day earlier than me, so it's not very nice of me to extend for too long. We were in the states for a week plus, close to 2 weeks, so need to go back here to clear any backlog etc.

So anyway...here's my really short trip to San Francisco...

The trip was on 9 Oct, Saturday. Woke up early to catch the 6am bus shuttle service from hotel to the airport. Boss was leaving back to Singapore while me to SFO.

Thank goodness I have a colleague who used to stay long in the states, so he recommended me to a very cheap domestic budget airline. The 2-way trips was about USD$160, very reasonable price =)

It's a free seating and I got to sit near the window and started snapping photos of top view of vegas =) The view was breathtaking =)

Here I was at Oakland. It only took me an hour from Vegas to Oakland, and from Oakland, I took a BART train which only took me about 20 mins to get to SFO's civic centre.

Below are the photos taken from a shuttle bus which took me to the BART station. Another of my colleagues told me that Oakland is rather unsafe, but as far as i experienced, hmm..not really..but i couldn't agree with him more that Oakland is rather looking downtown and poor..

And finally on the BART train..was pretty lucky when a group of tourists and I met one of the Oakland residents at the BART station and she taught us how to purchase the ticket from the ticketing machine. And indeed, the machine system is kinda different from Singapore's ticketing machine, and thank goodness, I have converted my card to debit card, so i can still use it to purchase the tickets there. It was in the states when i realise the importance of credit cards.

Tada, I've reached SFO and goodness me, everything which i have planned initially started to go haywire. i had to purchase an one-day bus pass and the buses which i planned were planned for midnight travel. Thank goodness, i met really nice residents there and they helped me with the directions.

Accidentally walked into the back alley of a street. Thinking that walking on such street in the daylight would not be that dangerous, but i was wrong. The alley was rather filled with poor black americans - the drunk ones, those who just stood around in small groups..and they kept staring at me as I walked past them. i was kinda afraid, especially when i knew i was alone there. So that sudden survival instinct just nudged me to increase my pace and walk out into the main street as soon as possible. It was rather a scaring crucial moment - anything can happen.

so anyway managed to find the right bus, and goodness me, met the most impolite and rather frustrated lady bus-driver. guess almost every passenger who got up her bus had asked her the same question,"Is this bus going to the Palace of Fine Arts/Golden Gate Bridge?" haha..i was not angry but just kinda amused by her attitude.

Love this place..it's the park where the Palace of Fine Arts is situated. the sky was clear, the whole park was quiet and peaceful, and there are rows of houses around the park. I felt like staying there.....

So next stop, to the Golden Gate Bridge! getting there was a terrible experience. Waited for the bus for almost an hour due to the flight week which was on that saturday. Traffic was packed and i was very behind my travel plan. Nevertheless, the Golden Gate Bridge is a must-to-see at SFO.

The Bridge is BREATHTAKING!!!! Love the engineering behind this bridge..one of the greatest engineering project in the world.

Due to the high suicide rate which happened on the bridge, they fenced up the "popular" suicide spots and put up several signs..to kinda warn the person to think before he/she jumps.

Don't know whether this sign "No U turn" is referring to the drivers or to any suicidal victim...

Managed to ask a tourist to help take a photo of me with the bridge. was rather hesitant over it as I was very afraid of my camera to be snatched away..and well, haha..had a good pick - the tourist can take photos pretty well. =)

And there there, again i waited impatiently for the bus to take me to the fisherman's wharf which was my next and final stop. but the bus was taking a long time and with no further hesitation, i grabbed a cab to go to the wharf. i was already very far behind time.

And there i was at the wharf, super crowded with people..!!!! it was fleet week when the sailors had their fleet docked at the wharf and airshows were going on..and goodness me, there was a huge jam at the road of the wharf..totally crowded, i couldn't see much, and i was behind time, i was losing patience.

So before i left the wharf, bought myself a small bowl of clam chowder (highly recommended by my colleague) and the chowder was awesome!!!!!!! the clams were big and fresh, the soup was totally non-MSG..i love it and told myself that i will want to come back here again, to try out their seafood platter here.

The story at SFO was not over yet. By the time when i left the wharf it was already 4pm and i needed to catch the return flight at 6pm to go back vegas.

tried to get on a bus to get me back to the civic centre but it was so jammed up in the traffic that walking can be faster than travelling on the bus.

So what i did in the end, was to get down the bus, put my camera in my backpack, strapped my backpack tightly and i started to run down south to the civic centre.

i don't know how long i have run, but with the map in hand, i just knew i needed to run all the way straight down to the town centre..i ran past the chinatown street, ran past the financial centre when i got almost lost there. i could not find the BART subway as indicated on the map, my watch showed 4.50pm and i was totally desperate for help. I asked a few passersby for direction and they just gave me a reply ,"I don't know".

I was completely devastated..kept thinking that I needed to catch this flight as this was the last flight to get me back to vegas for that day, or else i will need to extend one more day in the states.

At that desperate moment, i found a 24-hour store at the financial centre and quickly approached the staff for help.

And thank goodness!!!! The staff gave me the direction and I managed to find the BART station, returned to take the BART train, grab the BART shuttle bus just in time and reached the Oakland airport at 5.30pm. And I still managed to check in to grab the flight in time.

PHEW.

Haa..well, poor planning, you may think of me. Well, i agree with you. But thinking back, because of my poor planning, i had an extremely extraordinary journey at SFO in exchange. Price of the experience - priceless. =)

So all well, at least i'm glad i managed to grab my flight back home on 10 Oct, which took me almost a day to reach home on the 12th.

I am starting to catch up with my work - able to clear all my backlogs.

Presentation on monday was cancelled! YEAH! but it is postponed to next monday. Sigh. Sian. Seriously i kinda dread doing this ppt although i've prepared for it, it's not what i like to do.

anyway heck it - i was so stressed up the whole morning waiting for the sms to ask me go up, and in the end waiting in vain and in relief at the same time. so now i am keeping it cool. no stress.

suddenly the thought of not able to go to range to hit balls is killing me. ARGH!!! i dun have the clubs and i need to borrow..and i feel restrained, i feel waste of money cos after getting my proficiency cert i din go back anymore.

sigh, i need the exercise. Feeling stressful all of the sudden.

ANd yesh! course tomorrow!!!! 2 days of fun!! :p

this week will be the last week for my classes, later on everyone will be busy whacking their brains with exam notes.

for this semester's clinical attachment, i managed to follow one teacher who needs to tend to many patients within that 2.5 hrs of attachment. Learnt a lot from him..

in my fourth year now and i'm still feeling newbie in my knowledge capacity.. sigh.

Finally my ppt slides have been cleared and submitted up. Mixture of feelings - hope that I do not need to present on that day and hope I can present it well.

5 minutes, 20 slides, with a team of directors and CE staring at me. Most afraid of CE.

If I can get past this well, think there will be nothing i will be afraid of.

Can't wait for Monday to end. I seriously need a good break from that stress. I know for this round, I am not coping very well. But well i know myself and in any future i know how to handle such. =)

****************************************************

Been thinking a lot recently. I realise I love the feeling of being a loner at times, love the feeling of having control of my time and the things I want to do.

Yet I will still want to catch up with the few groups of friends.

****************************************************

Ever since I'm back from the states, i realise the feeling of travelling overseas..travelling alone..travelling at san francisco alone is an adventure - i love it. I have only myself to blame if I screw up the travelling plan. i may not be skilled at photography but i love taking snapshots of what i see and feel.

Can't wait for my next year's travelling plan - wanna head down to japan to meet my bro.

And i still wanna head to europe - when i was at vegas's venetian and caesar's palace, i am totally awed by the architecture. wanna go to europe to feel the arts and the architecture.

and oh ya, being able to be at the golden gate bridge in SFO is a great experience. the engineering and the architecture..awesome..i can feel the firm structure of the bridge, the vibration coming from the fast-speeding cars travelling on the bridge...the experience is totally breath-taking.

Been trying to edit the ppt slides..it's crazy..

and started to have a lot of backlogs..gosh, i can feel myself unable to manage at all..think even my boss starts to notice all the outstanding items.. hmm..this is not good..but really hopefully by tomorrow i can clear majority of the backlogs..

Sigh, still waiting for clearance of ppt slides from my director.. Monday is the ppt... =s

And next week may be a better week! Am "specially selected" by HR to be in the pioneer group to attend one pretty popular training course which they are intending to roll out to all executives..they are pretty good with words - "specially selected"..aha..but it does make me feel good and important in a way. ahhaa..

Have not had the time to go range..i kinda miss playing golf. =(

I'm back!!! Hmm..ok, i'm back a week ago. Haa..

Haven't been managed to blog..once i'm back to singapore, there i am preparing the trip report and the slides. gotta present to the senior management.. =s

sigh, been feeling extremely tired and not looking forward to present slides to the smm, though i have just completed editing the slides after presenting them to my director on wed and receive feedback and suggestions to improve on the slides. think the slides are looking good, and now clearing with my boss..hopefully the slides' content will be able to address the concern.

Did a presentation to a group of pri 4 to 5 kids on thursday morning..they were all so cute and lively..!! had a lot of fun interacting with them. and during that time, i wish the smm will be as lively as them. had sat in their meeting once and the atmosphere was horrifying. stressful to the max.

the week has been a havoc, lotsa things which require my attention.. sigh..

have not edited the photos which i took in the states yet, so still need some time to upload them on FB.

This time preparing for exams is not going to be easy for me. there's a clash of leave between my officer and mine, he needs to go overseas to attend a family matter and my boss needs either one of us need to be able to cover each other. so lucky thing my boss is understanding - during that exam period, she allows me to take afternoon half day leave so that at least i have half day to prepare for my exam. which means i can start studying for exam now.

Can't sleep now. Too nervous for Saturday morning flight.

Besides attending the conference, will be going to Grand Canyon with my boss..haa..and AND I've booked for skydiving..AWesomme!!! hahaa..will be going for that without my boss, but it's alright..! =) I'm feeling very nervous for that too..

and last but not least, for my last day in US, I've booked a domestic flight to visit San Francisco for sightseeing! Flying from Las Vegas to Oakland, then shall take a BART service to San Francisco, intending to grab the limited amount of time to go to Golden Gate Bridge, fisherman's wrath, pier 39, etc, taking photos..feeling very nervous for this trip, as i'll be travelling all by myself - it's a test to myself to learn to be more independent, and yes, probably fulfilling my dream to travel overseas alone.

The more I think about it, the more I want to work in an environment which allows me to travel overseas constantly and yet i can always take that chance to take a break..sigh, guess this is everyone's dream job...

I can feel that this trip is going to be a good substitute of my graduation trip which I never get to fulfill after my final year exam.

My 1st bro has left for japan for his studies..the house does feel quieter and awkward in a way. Just for tonight, i have to sms a list of my parents' nagging to him. haha...can't wait for his internet to be up and my parents can spend the time in front of the webcam nagging at him..

whahahaa...

Upon reflecting on my life so far, I realise I've been slogging like a mad cow and I've missed many opportunities to take a good break.

I dun know why I'm feeling a little down now. guess i really want to have a good long break, which i guess that'll be when i retire.

Think i wanna skip my class tmr and head home to continue packing my luggage..i seriously need some break away from school - 4 days a week can be a torment at times when you realise you never have any time for yourself.

Exams in end nov - oh my goodness....

Finally it's Friday!! =D

Saw one of my TJ classmates' post over FB. Wow, he actually wrote a book and it is now being published for public sale. Went to look at his blog - very well written.

So just wanna his blog with all of you, and if interested, get the book. haha..quite unofficial publicity for him.

www.alittlenudge.wordpress.com

Thank God it's Thursday..Been feeling extremely tired for the week.

Starting to get excited over my official trip! Going to stay one more day after the conference and it's going to be all by myself while my boss will be leaving on that day.

I can't believe myself that I actually gave a piece of my mind to AG last night over a matter. Hmm..actually to most of you will definitely find it ridiculous, even when I'm reflecting right now, i feel the same way too. But I was really upset about it last night.

Am really glad that AG was very tolerant to the tantrum I threw last night. I did explain to him last night that I was doing this now cos I didn't want to have this matter hidden and snowballed within me, and I didn't throw this matter out in any event we were to argue over other un-related matters.

Felt kinda guilty this morning..i felt i was like a crazy lady, or paranoid..or i dun know..after self-reflection, i felt super embarrassed and guilty about my behaviour and mood. Then again, i felt a lot better after trashing it out to AG.

Very contradicting of me...

Friday tomorrow!!! Another dinner eat-out with family tomorrow!! =D Sizzler...!!!!! =D

Yeah, the photos are out!! With courtesy by ZJ..

Under dim lighting, I like this make-up..haha..

Some time ago, after the make-up lesson with ZJ they all, went to Esplanade with AG for Baybeat Festival. His childhood friend forms a rock band and the band was invited to perform! Very good band - love the vocal..and to my surprise his friend is pretty academically outstanding as well. Wow.

Anyway quite challenging to shoot under that changing range of lighting. My techniques are still noobish..but it's alright, motivate me to do better for other events!

Got quite stuck choosing the 2 photos as below. Not sure which one looks better.

Been a great weekend spent with AG =)

He brought me to ECP for a mini night pinic on Friday after I've finished my clinical attachment..and he actually played our song...whahhahaha..sounds super lame to me, BUT somehow it just feels super sweet...as usual I could not help giggling away when he actually played the song..whahaha..but he's very sweet to celebrate our late anniversary..

Went to hit the golf course together with AG on Saturday. I love playing golf with him =)
This time, I hit better, but still need to be more confident in hitting the ball on grass.

Sunday, another great relaxing Sunday. =) Slack around and Paige peed in the house cos she couldn't hold on just for that one minute to let her out for a pee..AG and I went to hit the grass range to improve on our skills..and finally dinner.. =)

My throat seems to get better now, went to see the doctor on Thursday after realising that I dislike the discomfort of my throat which was affecting my work performance.

Oki, work tomorrow..sigh..but it's a short week, yeah..!! can't wait for the end of Thursday =D

Throat infection..and 2 days of mc..goodness me..I was shocked that my fever causes me 2 days of mc..think the doctor saw my reaction and my worried look, he explained that my high fever will take some time to subside..

Paige, AG's dog, is falling sick too..

Waiting at the clinic now..my fever has gone down a bit, and I'm still feeling kinda blur now..last night's sleep was a big struggle - there's a point in time when my temperature reached 39.4degC. Could feel my palms exceptionally warm and I was constantly having weird dreams, dreamt of how different part of my body turned into human beings and started to go through some sort of crisis management..

It was 2nd year anniversary for AG and me yesterday. Not a good timing to fall sick on this day :( was guilty about it..but AG was sweet last night - while he was driving me home, he turned down the music volume and changed the music station to the one with more soothing music so that I can take a good rest in the car..

Still waiting at the clinic..so long...... :(

Received another piece of good news today.

I've earlier signed up as volunteer photographer for singapore cancer society and this afternoon I received an email from them that they are requesting me to be their photographer for a seminar!! I'm so happy!! :D

anyway have been trying to keep my happiness of being having the opportunity to go las Vegas to myself in office. Want to keep it at low profile as much as possible..

Went to the range for a while and gosh my skills have deteriorated much after 2 weeks of no practice :(
bad bad bad..

For today's horse riding, I got the same horse "Greystone"..compared to last week, he was quite hard to control, refused to go to the muddy area and would try to challenge me as and when. Was frightened at a point in time when he tried to break loose from my rein. He was impatient and always wanted to walk on. A horse with huge ego.

But when it comes to fall in, he is always very obedient. Hmm, funny horse.

At the lesson, learnt from the trainer that Greystone used to be a racing horse, no wonder he has high ego.

Next lesson will be the last. I'm going to miss Greystone.

************************************************************************

Yesterday I received an email from HR - approval from the company's Chief Executive.
It is something which my boss had told me earlier on. It was finally approved.

I'm going to Las Vegas, Nevada!!! In early October. To attend a conference with my boss!!! She is going to present a paper there and
I feel very lucky to be able to go there with her.

But after the trip I will need to write a trip report. The trip is an overseas competency development (developed by HR) for executives. So which means I need to prepare lotsa homework to be brought back Singapore to prepare the report.

Anyway it's all the way to US, so cool!!! and I'm so excited!!!! :D

My camera is coming in handy...heee heee.. :D

It's a Monday blue. I'm feeling moody.

I miss horse riding and I miss playing golf at the range. And I wanna try out playing at the course again. I dun believe I can't play well.

Sigh. I dun know why - I feel sian....

SIGH..........

Went to hit the course yesterday morning with AG and his friends. The start was not a good one - i hit horribly, the shots were so bad, worse than those on the range. First time hitting the course, and there were so many rules and etiquette which I've no idea at all.

hmm, i was so confused and frustrated with AG and the ignorance of the rules that I kinda threw tramplet in a quiet way and for a short while. But later after that, i kinda simmered down.

Gosh, I was really pissed off that time.

After that, went to watch the chinese musical "December Rain". Kit Chan has very beautiful voice and she is really good!!!

Long weekend. Not a very enjoyable one for me though. Work troubles me in the midst and I have to make one cruel decision. But i still feel good with ZJ's and AG's company

Went for hotel recce and ZJ they all and golf with AG. =)
Nice nice. =D

A friend gave these pieces of advice to me, with regards to the decision i've to make.
"Show some confidence in your decision making skills"
"Dun keep giving yourself 2nd opinions/self doubt"
It's true. I need to.

Met up Zhijia they all for movie! and hotel recce! haha..Watched the movie "Salt" - gooood movie =D thumbs up for angelina jolin! she's awesome in this movie.

Went for one hotel recce with them before i went for my lessons. Holiday Inn! Good place, but I think the ballroom can be better. And the next recce venue - Regent hotel - haha..seems that all 5 of us love the ballroom in Regent..haha..

all 4 of us are going to be jie meis for ZJ's wedding!! Ahhhhh!!! Excited!!!!

Anyway i am not able to hold that new appointed appointment for long - I need positive support from my parents.

Went to Bugis a few weeks ago in June..went for a short mini backpack journey to Bugis..whaha..trying out black and white series, with exception of one photo here..hahah..

anyway also went to the flea market but i'm not done with the photo editing. anyway almost everything in manual mode - ISO, aperture, shutter and focus.

Still learning...

I'm on 1 day time off today! Yeah! Shiok! =D