Did a much better paper today..but hm today very blur, left her jacket in sch while on our way journey back to boon lay..haha..somemore as we were making a detour back to sch, it's pouring heavily, as if it's trying to make our journey difficult.hhaa..but luckily, hm still managed to find her jacket..hee..then also met weiming in sch too. Heard that his business law is not easy to handle, but then again, dennis is there to help him, so hopefully his business law can do well..haa..
the bk staff in my fav study place are very ke-ai..especially one working staff, the one who asks me whether i'm taking 'O' level exams now..hha..he knows wat to add on to my order. cos my order is pretty standard. hahaha...so funny..hha..
Having my last paper this fri. Be having a seafood buffet dinner with my family on that evening..me so excited..!! (^-^)
Realised tat i've been quite rude to my parents. I have no idea why..sigh..my temper is real nasty ever since the break-up.
Mood swing too. And i dislike the situation which i am in now. Whole mixed feelings.
Intending to have my hair cut and have it a temporary large-curl perm, see how i look with that hairstyle. Intending to buy more clothes, no longer purchasing t-shirt..be exercising more to lose weight..spend money...
i jus have this feeling to spend money.
Je suis fatiguee' beaucoup. =(
anyway intro u a mtv movie by jay chou. i love this mtv..in fact, i love the lycris. Gloomy lycris but i love its gloominess..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OjvyaCRNyX4
enjoy!!
Thursday, November 30, 2006
Monday, November 27, 2006
Wat a day to start (T_T) | wat a day to end (^^)
* The chapter of (T_T) *
Juz got killed by the structural design paper. Think i'm going to flunk it and re-take this module.
Sigh. Going to break my record. (T_T)
Ever since the first day i entered school, i've never repeat any module.
SIGH.
(T_T) Very sad.
* The chapter of (-_-) *
Someone tried to show me care and concern. He knows that i'm not feeling happy after the exams. But i have rejected. I really dun wan to start a 2nd relationship so soon. I am really tired. I know my efforts in putting the 2nd one now will only be 40%. sigh....
I see long-term in fascination. But I see short-term in reality.
* The chapter of (^^) *
Got hit by a rusty nail at home, after my dinner juz now.
Parents freaked out.
Cos it's a rusty nail.
I walked down alone to the clinic opposite my house.
It's raining.
And i'm a little depressed. Cos I feel alone of a sudden.
Din msg my that friend cos i've this strong feeling he'll rush down to the clinic. He did sth like this once before, so i know.
Got beiing called "auntie" by one stupid igorant teenager guy.
Just cos i wear my home clothes down and look a bit auntie.
Of course, the teenager realised he made a real big-time mistake when he turned to look at me. Realised my age doesn't fit auntie at all.
Realised he's in big time trouble.
Cos i'm basically looking at him, looking real big time offended.
But things changed after i entered the clinical office of this particular doctor.
He is so cute...!!!
Not this looks.
But his actions. (^^)
First time saw such a doctor. Before he asks me wat happened to me, he will introduce himself,"Hi, welcome to ______. I'm Dr.____...." And then he waved to me.
First, it's my first time when i see a doctor introduce himself before asking patient about his condition. Secondly, he waved to me mildly. It's like those wave with a little shyness.. (^^) so cute...his actions..
hhaa..obviously, i waved to him. haha..i should have introduced myself too. But cos i'm bit surprised by his actions, then i juz waved and smiled at him..hahaha.. (^^)
Dun know why, it feels tat it's my first time when i received TLC from a guy. haha...feels very happy..
First time i saw a doctor will paste a handiplast on the injection wound. Feels like some ai-xin handiplast..first time i saw a doctor help me wash my puncture wound so gently tat i hardly feel any pain.
ahhhh... (^^) i feel like so xing fu...at tat moment..!!
Cos everytime when i'm injured, i always treat myself. Cos i believe a lot of people think i've learnt first aid, so definitely can do self-treatment. But don't they know that first aiders need TLC from others too when they are injured?
Really..it's my first time feeling TLC from a guy.. (T_T) i feel so touched and xing fu...
And he's cute too..!!!
Sigh...too bad i can't get to know him more..hahahaaa...omg..
In fact, i have the urge to ask him medical knowledge about puncture wounds, more about tentanus. I've so many questions in my mind, but i don't dare to ask him..scare he'll be irritated. =p
But well, ended up walking home happily. Smiling away. Almost slipped and fell on my way home..ahaa..
Think i'm going to smile while sleeping tonight..haha... (^^)
Juz got killed by the structural design paper. Think i'm going to flunk it and re-take this module.
Sigh. Going to break my record. (T_T)
Ever since the first day i entered school, i've never repeat any module.
SIGH.
(T_T) Very sad.
* The chapter of (-_-) *
Someone tried to show me care and concern. He knows that i'm not feeling happy after the exams. But i have rejected. I really dun wan to start a 2nd relationship so soon. I am really tired. I know my efforts in putting the 2nd one now will only be 40%. sigh....
I see long-term in fascination. But I see short-term in reality.
* The chapter of (^^) *
Got hit by a rusty nail at home, after my dinner juz now.
Parents freaked out.
Cos it's a rusty nail.
I walked down alone to the clinic opposite my house.
It's raining.
And i'm a little depressed. Cos I feel alone of a sudden.
Din msg my that friend cos i've this strong feeling he'll rush down to the clinic. He did sth like this once before, so i know.
Got beiing called "auntie" by one stupid igorant teenager guy.
Just cos i wear my home clothes down and look a bit auntie.
Of course, the teenager realised he made a real big-time mistake when he turned to look at me. Realised my age doesn't fit auntie at all.
Realised he's in big time trouble.
Cos i'm basically looking at him, looking real big time offended.
But things changed after i entered the clinical office of this particular doctor.
He is so cute...!!!
Not this looks.
But his actions. (^^)
First time saw such a doctor. Before he asks me wat happened to me, he will introduce himself,"Hi, welcome to ______. I'm Dr.____...." And then he waved to me.
First, it's my first time when i see a doctor introduce himself before asking patient about his condition. Secondly, he waved to me mildly. It's like those wave with a little shyness.. (^^) so cute...his actions..
hhaa..obviously, i waved to him. haha..i should have introduced myself too. But cos i'm bit surprised by his actions, then i juz waved and smiled at him..hahaha.. (^^)
Dun know why, it feels tat it's my first time when i received TLC from a guy. haha...feels very happy..
First time i saw a doctor will paste a handiplast on the injection wound. Feels like some ai-xin handiplast..first time i saw a doctor help me wash my puncture wound so gently tat i hardly feel any pain.
ahhhh... (^^) i feel like so xing fu...at tat moment..!!
Cos everytime when i'm injured, i always treat myself. Cos i believe a lot of people think i've learnt first aid, so definitely can do self-treatment. But don't they know that first aiders need TLC from others too when they are injured?
Really..it's my first time feeling TLC from a guy.. (T_T) i feel so touched and xing fu...
And he's cute too..!!!
Sigh...too bad i can't get to know him more..hahahaaa...omg..
In fact, i have the urge to ask him medical knowledge about puncture wounds, more about tentanus. I've so many questions in my mind, but i don't dare to ask him..scare he'll be irritated. =p
But well, ended up walking home happily. Smiling away. Almost slipped and fell on my way home..ahaa..
Think i'm going to smile while sleeping tonight..haha... (^^)
Fine already.. (",)
I'm fine le..thanks zhijia, dennis, dly, simon....n thanks cecilia for the funny comics which u email me..haha..it does cheer me up..thanks people.. (",)
Talked to my mum nicely after coming back from my revision outside. As long as that issue is not mentioned, safe.
Not a very motivated mood to study today. Open-book exam later for structural design. Usually it means a tough paper. I've tasted it before in my yr 1's 1st semester physics exam. Almost killed me. x_x
Going to get real busy after exam. the vietnam trip training camp..standard chartered..going round to search for overseas call plan..preparing to pack my stuff...Read books (recently find a few literary novels worth to read)..n exercise ( I realise i've put on weight le..) ..n buy clothes n shoes (intending to change the way i dress when going out wif frens)..n oh ya, teach my student before leaving for vietnam..
My house is going to have some up-grading works in 2 days'time..sigh..have to go down to the mobile toilet to bathe...feels like going to have some kampong life soon..haha..basically my neighbourhood is having upgrading construction project. My house is going to have new windows, new toilets, new gate and a fire-proof door...And in the future, juz almost next to my house, there'll be a newly-built lift..haha..feel that the lift is specially built for my family. So near to my house. Just stepped out of my house door, and there you go. My personal lift which i am generous enough to share with my fellow neighbours..hahahaaaa...
Hopefully can pass the structural design paper. i'm not greedy for this. i juz wan a pass. tat's all..haha.. =p
Talked to my mum nicely after coming back from my revision outside. As long as that issue is not mentioned, safe.
Not a very motivated mood to study today. Open-book exam later for structural design. Usually it means a tough paper. I've tasted it before in my yr 1's 1st semester physics exam. Almost killed me. x_x
Going to get real busy after exam. the vietnam trip training camp..standard chartered..going round to search for overseas call plan..preparing to pack my stuff...Read books (recently find a few literary novels worth to read)..n exercise ( I realise i've put on weight le..) ..n buy clothes n shoes (intending to change the way i dress when going out wif frens)..n oh ya, teach my student before leaving for vietnam..
My house is going to have some up-grading works in 2 days'time..sigh..have to go down to the mobile toilet to bathe...feels like going to have some kampong life soon..haha..basically my neighbourhood is having upgrading construction project. My house is going to have new windows, new toilets, new gate and a fire-proof door...And in the future, juz almost next to my house, there'll be a newly-built lift..haha..feel that the lift is specially built for my family. So near to my house. Just stepped out of my house door, and there you go. My personal lift which i am generous enough to share with my fellow neighbours..hahahaaaa...
Hopefully can pass the structural design paper. i'm not greedy for this. i juz wan a pass. tat's all..haha.. =p
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Irritated..Very Irritated..
I'm absolutely irritated with my mum. Had a big quarrel with her over some stuff.
Really dislike the way how she communicates with me and asks questions.
For example, there is this sch name "xxxxxxxx secondary sch".
And next a question pops up like this, "What school is this?"
What would your answer be?
Basically my answer to it is,"it's a neighbourhood sch. it's a secondary sch."
I wonder how many people have such same answer as me.
And basically my mum is very unhappy with my this answer.
But that's the question n i give her the right answer. "It's a neighbourhood sch."
So, my brother gave such an answer, "It's not a very good sch. I recommend dun go."
And guess what? She's happy with it.
What the...
That answer is basically a personal opinion-based answer.
And I started telling her that that's not the right way to ask a question. Told her that she should say,"What do you think of this sch? Is it a good sch?" or "How is the academic environment in this sch? is it good?"
Later, she got irritated and the whole quarrel sparks fire.
Basically she's asking a generalised question and is expecting a specific answer.
NO.
She is expecting an opinion-based answer.
O_O
$&%!*#&(!)#*)!^%$#&^!&*)(_!*&*^%!#^@&#*(+_
OK. That's one incident.
Just now, a guy friend called me, just for a decent chat. And she asked. So i told her honestly. Guess what? She's telling stuff that she doesn't like this fellow and will not allow me to start any special relationship with him. O_O WHAT THE...!!!!
SO BASICALLY WHENEVER A GUY TALKS TO ME ON THE PHONE, SO IT'S NOTHING DECENT? AND WHATEVER FRIEND I MAKE, HAS TO GO THROUGH HER, IS IT?
&%^(!&#*^&$&*^&#)!(*#&!^&#)!
I thought being honest with her is fine, will make my mum feel at ease. But basically her response is horrible and disappoints me utterly. From now onwards, I'll not tell her any guy friend. I will just lie to her.
Who tells her that she gives me such response to my honesty?
I make sure I earn lotsa money and get out of this house where i can't even be treated respectfully as a person. I will still come back n visit my parents. And definitely, i will still help my brothers whatever i can. But i will not stay in this house, even if i'm single.
Already, ever since the whole break-up incident, my temper has dropped rock bottom. My tolerance level has dropped rock bottom. Vent more anger now. Whenever walking on the street alone, i will stone or look dumb. Had much more quarrels with my parents, especially my mum. Before the break-up, i have very little quarrels with them. Dislike her telling me stuff which i dun like to hear and i've no mood to heatr. All i wan to do is to study and work and earn money. I am getting sick of relationship. The more my mum lectures me, the more i get pissed about relationship.
I'm really quite sick and tired of this whole stupid life.
Shouted at my mum over the friend thingy just now. I know i am wrong to do that. I know it's very disrespectful of me. But i really can't take it anymore. Last time, I will keep quiet and keep everything to myself, and cried cried cried. Now i really hate to do this. Cos almost everytime when i do that, i feel myself almost hyperventilating and finding hard to breathe.
Structural Design is already giving me a big headache. Find it hard to do the problems in the past-year exam papers. Having quite a headache now. And my shoulder blades are aching again. All i want to focus is how to handle my studies. And yet my mum juz keeps telling me things which are unneceassary for me at this current stage. And everytime when i hear such issues, i will juz start getting irritated.
Get me out of here and give me wings to fly.
Really dislike the way how she communicates with me and asks questions.
For example, there is this sch name "xxxxxxxx secondary sch".
And next a question pops up like this, "What school is this?"
What would your answer be?
Basically my answer to it is,"it's a neighbourhood sch. it's a secondary sch."
I wonder how many people have such same answer as me.
And basically my mum is very unhappy with my this answer.
But that's the question n i give her the right answer. "It's a neighbourhood sch."
So, my brother gave such an answer, "It's not a very good sch. I recommend dun go."
And guess what? She's happy with it.
What the...
That answer is basically a personal opinion-based answer.
And I started telling her that that's not the right way to ask a question. Told her that she should say,"What do you think of this sch? Is it a good sch?" or "How is the academic environment in this sch? is it good?"
Later, she got irritated and the whole quarrel sparks fire.
Basically she's asking a generalised question and is expecting a specific answer.
NO.
She is expecting an opinion-based answer.
O_O
$&%!*#&(!)#*)!^%$#&^!&*)(_!*&*^%!#^@&#*(+_
OK. That's one incident.
Just now, a guy friend called me, just for a decent chat. And she asked. So i told her honestly. Guess what? She's telling stuff that she doesn't like this fellow and will not allow me to start any special relationship with him. O_O WHAT THE...!!!!
SO BASICALLY WHENEVER A GUY TALKS TO ME ON THE PHONE, SO IT'S NOTHING DECENT? AND WHATEVER FRIEND I MAKE, HAS TO GO THROUGH HER, IS IT?
&%^(!&#*^&$&*^&#)!(*#&!^&#)!
I thought being honest with her is fine, will make my mum feel at ease. But basically her response is horrible and disappoints me utterly. From now onwards, I'll not tell her any guy friend. I will just lie to her.
Who tells her that she gives me such response to my honesty?
I make sure I earn lotsa money and get out of this house where i can't even be treated respectfully as a person. I will still come back n visit my parents. And definitely, i will still help my brothers whatever i can. But i will not stay in this house, even if i'm single.
Already, ever since the whole break-up incident, my temper has dropped rock bottom. My tolerance level has dropped rock bottom. Vent more anger now. Whenever walking on the street alone, i will stone or look dumb. Had much more quarrels with my parents, especially my mum. Before the break-up, i have very little quarrels with them. Dislike her telling me stuff which i dun like to hear and i've no mood to heatr. All i wan to do is to study and work and earn money. I am getting sick of relationship. The more my mum lectures me, the more i get pissed about relationship.
I'm really quite sick and tired of this whole stupid life.
Shouted at my mum over the friend thingy just now. I know i am wrong to do that. I know it's very disrespectful of me. But i really can't take it anymore. Last time, I will keep quiet and keep everything to myself, and cried cried cried. Now i really hate to do this. Cos almost everytime when i do that, i feel myself almost hyperventilating and finding hard to breathe.
Structural Design is already giving me a big headache. Find it hard to do the problems in the past-year exam papers. Having quite a headache now. And my shoulder blades are aching again. All i want to focus is how to handle my studies. And yet my mum juz keeps telling me things which are unneceassary for me at this current stage. And everytime when i hear such issues, i will juz start getting irritated.
Get me out of here and give me wings to fly.
Saturday, November 25, 2006
TIME
This is the official website for the korean movie which i've mentioned previously.
Find it a very nice story.
http://www.festivefilms.com/time/
Anyway juz realised the quotation which the female character says to her boyfriend, should be like this:
"Sorry for always having the same boring face."
hhaa...oops..completely different from what i've writeen... :p hhhaa..but BUT...it's all the same meaning...
hhaa.. xp
*Hope everything is fine for everyone around me...*
// 25th Nov //
HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY, CECILIA..!!! 21 loh...hhhaa...hope u enjoy MediOut..!!!
MediOut..!!!! HHoooOOOoo...!!! haa..
// 25 th //
Happy 25th...
Find it a very nice story.
http://www.festivefilms.com/time/
Anyway juz realised the quotation which the female character says to her boyfriend, should be like this:
"Sorry for always having the same boring face."
hhaa...oops..completely different from what i've writeen... :p hhhaa..but BUT...it's all the same meaning...
hhaa.. xp
*Hope everything is fine for everyone around me...*
// 25th Nov //
HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY, CECILIA..!!! 21 loh...hhhaa...hope u enjoy MediOut..!!!
MediOut..!!!! HHoooOOOoo...!!! haa..
// 25 th //
Happy 25th...
Friday, November 24, 2006
22nd day | 23rd day
// 22nd day //
Strength resolutely to say "NO" when we are tempted or persuaded to do anything which is wrong;
Patience to say to ourselves "Wait", when we are in too big a hurry;
Resolution to say "Now" when we are inclined to put it off till some future what should be done today;
...
A sense of responsibility, so that we may always think of how our actions will affect not only ourselves but others also.
...
// End //
// 23rd day //
Keep our thoughts so clean and pure that they may be fit for you to see.
Help us to live that even our secret actions, the things we do when there is no man to see, may be fit to be open to your sight.
O God, our Father, we know that there are those who love us.
Help us never to do anything to hurt or disappoint them.
Help us never to do anything which would make us less fit to be loved.
O God, our Father, we know that there are those whom we have an influence.
Help us never to do anything which would make it easier for them to go wrong.
Help us never to place temption in their way.
Help us to remember that there are things in this world which cost too much, and there are pleasure which can be too dearly bought, and help us to live, that life may be even stronger and purer and kinder day by day so that at the end of the days there may be nothing of which to be ashamed and nothing to regret.
// End //
// Pre-25th syndrome //
I'm having it again. Sigh.
Realised myself to have the urge to tear whenever someone treats me nice. Cos it always reminds me of things.
Watched a Korean movie preview "Time" which will be showing up in the later part of the year. Sad plot. The girlfriend goes for a complete facial plastic surgery cos she feels that things are getting duller along the many years of relationship with her man, and feels that the relationship is maintained for the sake of maintaining, feels that he doesn't love her as much as he used to be. She says something which strikes me, which is something like this,"I'm sorry that you have to see my this face for so many years." And after that, she leaves for a plastic surgery.
(-_-)
// Recovered from syndrome //
// Happy feet //
DLY told me sth which has kinda made my day today, despite being paranoid over my geo-environ paper.
hHaa..very happy.. (^^)
But i'll not write it here what he told me, cos if i were to write it out, i feel myself being thick-skinned..hhaa..
// tap tap tap //
Strength resolutely to say "NO" when we are tempted or persuaded to do anything which is wrong;
Patience to say to ourselves "Wait", when we are in too big a hurry;
Resolution to say "Now" when we are inclined to put it off till some future what should be done today;
...
A sense of responsibility, so that we may always think of how our actions will affect not only ourselves but others also.
...
// End //
// 23rd day //
Keep our thoughts so clean and pure that they may be fit for you to see.
Help us to live that even our secret actions, the things we do when there is no man to see, may be fit to be open to your sight.
O God, our Father, we know that there are those who love us.
Help us never to do anything to hurt or disappoint them.
Help us never to do anything which would make us less fit to be loved.
O God, our Father, we know that there are those whom we have an influence.
Help us never to do anything which would make it easier for them to go wrong.
Help us never to place temption in their way.
Help us to remember that there are things in this world which cost too much, and there are pleasure which can be too dearly bought, and help us to live, that life may be even stronger and purer and kinder day by day so that at the end of the days there may be nothing of which to be ashamed and nothing to regret.
// End //
// Pre-25th syndrome //
I'm having it again. Sigh.
Realised myself to have the urge to tear whenever someone treats me nice. Cos it always reminds me of things.
Watched a Korean movie preview "Time" which will be showing up in the later part of the year. Sad plot. The girlfriend goes for a complete facial plastic surgery cos she feels that things are getting duller along the many years of relationship with her man, and feels that the relationship is maintained for the sake of maintaining, feels that he doesn't love her as much as he used to be. She says something which strikes me, which is something like this,"I'm sorry that you have to see my this face for so many years." And after that, she leaves for a plastic surgery.
(-_-)
// Recovered from syndrome //
// Happy feet //
DLY told me sth which has kinda made my day today, despite being paranoid over my geo-environ paper.
hHaa..very happy.. (^^)
But i'll not write it here what he told me, cos if i were to write it out, i feel myself being thick-skinned..hhaa..
// tap tap tap //
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
21st day
// 21st day //
Those who are ill and pain;
Those who are waiting for an operation;
Those who are waiting for a doctor's diagnosis and verdict and who fear the worst;
Bless them.
Those who are nervous, worried, anxious, afraid of life;
Those who are on the verge of a nervous breakdown;
Those who feel that they cannot cope with life;
Bless them.
Those who are hungry and cold;
Those who are refugees with no home;
Those who are persecuted and those who have lost their freedom:
Bless them.
Out of your great riches supply the need of those distressed in body, mind or heart.
// End //
// Daily stuff //
Juz finished another paper..!!! Sigh..thought for this paper, i can score super well..na..forget it..
Lucky had DLY..haha..he treated me one mac ice cream cone today..!! haha..me so happy..has free ice cream to eat...ahahaa
So for those who know dly, if u are down or demoralised, u know who to look for for a free mac ice cream cone..haha.. =p *someone's gg to kill me* hahaa..
Felt a bit demoralised .. Sigh.. T_T
Yesterday when i woke up, had a utterly terribly bad shoulder ache..lucky it aches on my left side..but it's a torture to stand the pain, while studying for my today's paper. Think i've stressed myself too much, as what my parents had told me. I believe it's due to lack of small exercises, so body starts to take effect to tell me that it needs some rest although my brain can still keep working..
Now better, but still aches bit. Realised my body's physio-limitations. Last time's terrible sore eyes, now back ache. =(
Oki, i know a lot of my friends now are having exams now. So to end, i'll have a prayer for all of u...
Kanbatte..!!
// Prayer before Examinations //
Lord, it seems as though our lives are one tests after another, weighing us in somebody's balance.
Save us from taking the coming examinations too seriously or too lightly, but grant that we may reflect the best of the work we've done and the best of the teaching we've received; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Those who are ill and pain;
Those who are waiting for an operation;
Those who are waiting for a doctor's diagnosis and verdict and who fear the worst;
Bless them.
Those who are nervous, worried, anxious, afraid of life;
Those who are on the verge of a nervous breakdown;
Those who feel that they cannot cope with life;
Bless them.
Those who are hungry and cold;
Those who are refugees with no home;
Those who are persecuted and those who have lost their freedom:
Bless them.
Out of your great riches supply the need of those distressed in body, mind or heart.
// End //
// Daily stuff //
Juz finished another paper..!!! Sigh..thought for this paper, i can score super well..na..forget it..
Lucky had DLY..haha..he treated me one mac ice cream cone today..!! haha..me so happy..has free ice cream to eat...ahahaa
So for those who know dly, if u are down or demoralised, u know who to look for for a free mac ice cream cone..haha.. =p *someone's gg to kill me* hahaa..
Felt a bit demoralised .. Sigh.. T_T
Yesterday when i woke up, had a utterly terribly bad shoulder ache..lucky it aches on my left side..but it's a torture to stand the pain, while studying for my today's paper. Think i've stressed myself too much, as what my parents had told me. I believe it's due to lack of small exercises, so body starts to take effect to tell me that it needs some rest although my brain can still keep working..
Now better, but still aches bit. Realised my body's physio-limitations. Last time's terrible sore eyes, now back ache. =(
Oki, i know a lot of my friends now are having exams now. So to end, i'll have a prayer for all of u...
Kanbatte..!!
// Prayer before Examinations //
Lord, it seems as though our lives are one tests after another, weighing us in somebody's balance.
Save us from taking the coming examinations too seriously or too lightly, but grant that we may reflect the best of the work we've done and the best of the teaching we've received; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Monday, November 20, 2006
19th day | 20th day
// 19th day //
Help us at all times to remember our responsibility to ourselves.
Help us, never to act in such a way that we shall lose our self-respect.
Never to let ourselves down by doing something which is mean and low, disloyal and dishonourable;
Help us at all times to remember our responsibilities to our fellowmen.
Help us, Not to be the kind of people who are always remembering their rights and always forgetting their duties.
Not to be the kind of people who want to get everything out of life and nothing into it;
Help us at all times to remember our responsibilities to you.
Help us to remember that we shall answer to you for the way we have used the gifts you gavce us...
*the remaining sentences are more religious, so not intending to put them here, so as to respect everyone's religious belief.*
// 20th day //
Help us to remember that;
There is no achievement without work;
There is no learning without study;
There is no skill of body or of mind without discipline.
Help us to remember that,
There is no purity without vigilance;
There is no friendship without loyalty;
There is no love without the death of self.
Help us to remember that,
There is no joy without service;
There is no disciplineship without devotion,
There is no crown without a cross.
So help us to be willing to pay a price that we may enter into our reward.
// Reflections //
Trying to be good is very difficult. SIgh. Why do people go through so many stages of tests? for future judgement? or for evaluation of self-worth?
I know not all the time, i can be a nice person. I know there are times when i've failed to fulfill my many responsibilities.
// Stuff //
Later at 1300, my french theory exam. Hope everything goes smooth and well. Hope can finish the paper fast so that i can have more time to study for my hydraulics exam which is tomorrow...
AHHH... je suis fatiguee...
But i will KANBATTE...!!!
KANBATTE, everyone...!!!!!!!! KKKKAAANNNBBBATTTEEEE..!! *kanbatte in short*haha
Help us at all times to remember our responsibility to ourselves.
Help us, never to act in such a way that we shall lose our self-respect.
Never to let ourselves down by doing something which is mean and low, disloyal and dishonourable;
Help us at all times to remember our responsibilities to our fellowmen.
Help us, Not to be the kind of people who are always remembering their rights and always forgetting their duties.
Not to be the kind of people who want to get everything out of life and nothing into it;
Help us at all times to remember our responsibilities to you.
Help us to remember that we shall answer to you for the way we have used the gifts you gavce us...
*the remaining sentences are more religious, so not intending to put them here, so as to respect everyone's religious belief.*
// 20th day //
Help us to remember that;
There is no achievement without work;
There is no learning without study;
There is no skill of body or of mind without discipline.
Help us to remember that,
There is no purity without vigilance;
There is no friendship without loyalty;
There is no love without the death of self.
Help us to remember that,
There is no joy without service;
There is no disciplineship without devotion,
There is no crown without a cross.
So help us to be willing to pay a price that we may enter into our reward.
// Reflections //
Trying to be good is very difficult. SIgh. Why do people go through so many stages of tests? for future judgement? or for evaluation of self-worth?
I know not all the time, i can be a nice person. I know there are times when i've failed to fulfill my many responsibilities.
// Stuff //
Later at 1300, my french theory exam. Hope everything goes smooth and well. Hope can finish the paper fast so that i can have more time to study for my hydraulics exam which is tomorrow...
AHHH... je suis fatiguee...
But i will KANBATTE...!!!
KANBATTE, everyone...!!!!!!!! KKKKAAANNNBBBATTTEEEE..!! *kanbatte in short*haha
Saturday, November 18, 2006
// words of sigh //
sigh. Sigh. SIgh. SIGh. SIGH.
sigh. sigH. siGH. sIGH. SIGH.
siGh. sIGh. SIGh. SIGH.
SIGHHHHHHHH...
/* End */
// A note of Celebration //
HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY, BUDDY..!!! =D
/* End */
// 18th day //
Adapted from SAC hymn book:
18th DAY.
The clear sight to see the right way, and the preseverance to walk in it;
The vision to see the ideal,and the discipline to toil towards it.
Help us never to be satisfied
With words without deeds;
With plans without performance;
With schemes without results;
With dreams without toil to make the dream come true.
Teach us
That the way to the stars is always steep;
That sweat is the price of all things precious;
That there can never be any crown without a cross.
/* End */
// Reflections //
still trying to learn a lot of things, which i've realised about myself. This whole journey of life seems to have never-ending lessons. Decide to post many messages which are found in SAC hymn book. Still keep it. And realised that i've kept many treausures and memories in it. This book, i realise more even now, that it is one for me to do self-reflections with God.
Wanting to be more optimistic, rather than being more paraniod and depressed. Still wanna be the old me, the happy-go-lucky one, the one whom Anh used to know (cos he said sth which striked me a lot). But have been through some incidents which removes every bit of happiness in me.
Still, i have kinda decided. I want to be as optimistic as possible. Recently, being pessimistic, depressed and paranoid only affects my studies. I try to be optimistic, but of course, do expect a bit hiccups from me still. Especially things related to my parents. I juz realised myself that i enter this world is to bring as much joy as possible to people. Though there are times when my ignorance cause others troubles, i will learn from every mistake. But will try my best to avoid committing grave mistakes which piss others to the core till my sins are not forgiven and forgotten.
In order to retain the optimism, i decide to add one message of life adapted from my sec sch hymn book.
Somehow, i begin to realise.
How come i seem to grow up slower than the rest?
sigh. Sigh. SIgh. SIGh. SIGH.
sigh. sigH. siGH. sIGH. SIGH.
siGh. sIGh. SIGh. SIGH.
SIGHHHHHHHH...
/* End */
// A note of Celebration //
HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY, BUDDY..!!! =D
/* End */
// 18th day //
Adapted from SAC hymn book:
18th DAY.
The clear sight to see the right way, and the preseverance to walk in it;
The vision to see the ideal,and the discipline to toil towards it.
Help us never to be satisfied
With words without deeds;
With plans without performance;
With schemes without results;
With dreams without toil to make the dream come true.
Teach us
That the way to the stars is always steep;
That sweat is the price of all things precious;
That there can never be any crown without a cross.
/* End */
// Reflections //
still trying to learn a lot of things, which i've realised about myself. This whole journey of life seems to have never-ending lessons. Decide to post many messages which are found in SAC hymn book. Still keep it. And realised that i've kept many treausures and memories in it. This book, i realise more even now, that it is one for me to do self-reflections with God.
Wanting to be more optimistic, rather than being more paraniod and depressed. Still wanna be the old me, the happy-go-lucky one, the one whom Anh used to know (cos he said sth which striked me a lot). But have been through some incidents which removes every bit of happiness in me.
Still, i have kinda decided. I want to be as optimistic as possible. Recently, being pessimistic, depressed and paranoid only affects my studies. I try to be optimistic, but of course, do expect a bit hiccups from me still. Especially things related to my parents. I juz realised myself that i enter this world is to bring as much joy as possible to people. Though there are times when my ignorance cause others troubles, i will learn from every mistake. But will try my best to avoid committing grave mistakes which piss others to the core till my sins are not forgiven and forgotten.
In order to retain the optimism, i decide to add one message of life adapted from my sec sch hymn book.
Somehow, i begin to realise.
How come i seem to grow up slower than the rest?
Friday, November 17, 2006
omg..can't believe myself..again..haa..
me very tired today..
studied the whole day, but not very productive..sigh..
Bought a new handphone pouch today..cos the one which he gave it to me had spoilt.. sigh..
ya..maybe it's trying to tell me to change le..
REcently been on a spending spree, which i've no idea whether it is a good thing or not. First bought my laptop, next my handphone pouch, next food food food, etc...
Dun know what's wrong with me recently..things seem to be spoiling after the break-up.
I need to change my frameless spectacles soon. One of the lens are quite badky scratched and seem to be disturbing my eyesight. So recently been wearing the other spectacles. Not tat i wan look nerdy, but yup..hhaa..
Anyway sth funny happened today..
I was studying in BK today, in my new fav place. As usual, i'll go buy some drinks from the counter. as usual, i saw the same working staff there. So there's this one working guy staff who always works during that shift. So he's the one who took my order today. Think he is younger than me, still got a bit of the boyish look. But the thing is, he looks a bit like shaun, the one who used to be in my zone. haha.. =p
BUt, one funny thing is that he thought i was a student, taking 'O' level papers..
AHHHH....hhhaa..OMG...!!!
I've been mistaken to be a 16 yr old girl..!!! hahaaaa...i can't believe i can look tat young..
hhahaa..
Wat's funny next is that he looked kinda surprised..haha..shocked that i dun look an university student..shocked that i dun look as old as i am...
HHAAAAAAAHHAA...I find it very amusing...hahaaa..
----------------------------- END -------------------------------------
Someone writes this:
"...in some relationships, the harder u work, chase and cherish, the more she tries to run away. Plain knowing that u will never be far off but will keep u at an arm's length jus to be sure. Taunting u with her absurb antics jus so u will keep up with her erratic movements. Its so near yet so far. Pacing herself so precisely. Perseverance is the only thing u have in mind. Always believing that by kicking up ur effort level by a notch or two might close the gap. With time it gets tiring when u see no returns or even any signs of encouragements. Ur energy dwindles with ur extinguishing hope. U begin to settle down, hoping to recuperate whats left of that battered heart of urs, thinking that giving up and moving on might perhaps be the most logical and merciful decision for urself now. But it's really uncanny that she would then detect that dying pulse of ur heart like a cardiologist almost everytime and begins nearing u when u least expect it. Subjecting u to her relentless but subtle psychological seductions. Sparking new hope and energy into you jus to lead u into that viscious cycle, only to be tortured again and again. Clearly we know that's what might be awaiting us, but we will jus submit to it like a moth jetting towards an open flame. Its really painful but we will jus go head on. We are not masochistic, jus plainly in love...Stupid as stupid gets, but its jus sad to say that an honest man steadfast in love with perhaps the wrong person is like a sitting duck out in an open battle field, jus waiting to be killed. Its really maddening but certainly happening. Will we choose to give up then or will we not and jus decide to persevere on? I really dunno. On one hand, we can think that we might perish most probably and giving up is the most logical thing to do, but we probably might think that perhaps we can or will be that very last man standing after the end of the battle, emerging victorious after all. Battered but worthwhile...
Only God and she knows..."
Sigh.
studied the whole day, but not very productive..sigh..
Bought a new handphone pouch today..cos the one which he gave it to me had spoilt.. sigh..
ya..maybe it's trying to tell me to change le..
REcently been on a spending spree, which i've no idea whether it is a good thing or not. First bought my laptop, next my handphone pouch, next food food food, etc...
Dun know what's wrong with me recently..things seem to be spoiling after the break-up.
I need to change my frameless spectacles soon. One of the lens are quite badky scratched and seem to be disturbing my eyesight. So recently been wearing the other spectacles. Not tat i wan look nerdy, but yup..hhaa..
Anyway sth funny happened today..
I was studying in BK today, in my new fav place. As usual, i'll go buy some drinks from the counter. as usual, i saw the same working staff there. So there's this one working guy staff who always works during that shift. So he's the one who took my order today. Think he is younger than me, still got a bit of the boyish look. But the thing is, he looks a bit like shaun, the one who used to be in my zone. haha.. =p
BUt, one funny thing is that he thought i was a student, taking 'O' level papers..
AHHHH....hhhaa..OMG...!!!
I've been mistaken to be a 16 yr old girl..!!! hahaaaa...i can't believe i can look tat young..
hhahaa..
Wat's funny next is that he looked kinda surprised..haha..shocked that i dun look an university student..shocked that i dun look as old as i am...
HHAAAAAAAHHAA...I find it very amusing...hahaaa..
----------------------------- END -------------------------------------
Someone writes this:
"...in some relationships, the harder u work, chase and cherish, the more she tries to run away. Plain knowing that u will never be far off but will keep u at an arm's length jus to be sure. Taunting u with her absurb antics jus so u will keep up with her erratic movements. Its so near yet so far. Pacing herself so precisely. Perseverance is the only thing u have in mind. Always believing that by kicking up ur effort level by a notch or two might close the gap. With time it gets tiring when u see no returns or even any signs of encouragements. Ur energy dwindles with ur extinguishing hope. U begin to settle down, hoping to recuperate whats left of that battered heart of urs, thinking that giving up and moving on might perhaps be the most logical and merciful decision for urself now. But it's really uncanny that she would then detect that dying pulse of ur heart like a cardiologist almost everytime and begins nearing u when u least expect it. Subjecting u to her relentless but subtle psychological seductions. Sparking new hope and energy into you jus to lead u into that viscious cycle, only to be tortured again and again. Clearly we know that's what might be awaiting us, but we will jus submit to it like a moth jetting towards an open flame. Its really painful but we will jus go head on. We are not masochistic, jus plainly in love...Stupid as stupid gets, but its jus sad to say that an honest man steadfast in love with perhaps the wrong person is like a sitting duck out in an open battle field, jus waiting to be killed. Its really maddening but certainly happening. Will we choose to give up then or will we not and jus decide to persevere on? I really dunno. On one hand, we can think that we might perish most probably and giving up is the most logical thing to do, but we probably might think that perhaps we can or will be that very last man standing after the end of the battle, emerging victorious after all. Battered but worthwhile...
Only God and she knows..."
Sigh.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
One down, 6 more to go.
ONE down, finally..!!
Din have enough time to finish up. made a lot of careless mistakes, ended up spending some time, calculating the calculative mistakes.stupid..ended up losing one 12-marks question due to lack of time. i know how to do tat question.
sigh. so sad.
next coming up. my french theory paper on mon. followed up by tue's hydraulics. sigh.
very tired now. wanna rest soon.
Met my tat mad fren today. phew, my tat fren no longer mads at me le, me so happy. ha! =D
Din really talk to my mum over it. Find it no use talking. But definitely i find motivation to earn lotsa money. but then, most probably will start worryin about myself whether i will be blinded by materialistic stuff, and lose my own identity.
Din have enough time to finish up. made a lot of careless mistakes, ended up spending some time, calculating the calculative mistakes.stupid..ended up losing one 12-marks question due to lack of time. i know how to do tat question.
sigh. so sad.
next coming up. my french theory paper on mon. followed up by tue's hydraulics. sigh.
very tired now. wanna rest soon.
Met my tat mad fren today. phew, my tat fren no longer mads at me le, me so happy. ha! =D
Din really talk to my mum over it. Find it no use talking. But definitely i find motivation to earn lotsa money. but then, most probably will start worryin about myself whether i will be blinded by materialistic stuff, and lose my own identity.
Tuesday, November 14, 2006
SIAN. (-_-) AGAIN !!!
ME SIAN AGAIN.
MY MUM STARTED CALLING MY HANDPHONE NON-STOP. AND SHE KEPT REAL CLOSE TO MY TRAVELLING TIME. WHAT THE LA..!!!
CAN'T SHE JUZ BE AWARE THAT WHATEVER SHE IS DOING SUCH THING, IS CREATING ONE LEVEL OF STRESS UP? WHEN I REACH HOME, I CAN'T FOCUS WELL. THAT'S MY STUDY TECHNIQUE AND HABIT. I NEED TO STUDY OUTSIDE !!! AND SHE NEEDS TO KEEP SO SUPER CLOSE TRACK OF ME. AND ALL SHE CAN DO NOW IS TO ADD UNNECESSARY STUPID STRESS ON ME !!!!
EVERY TIME, WHEN I THINK OF THIS, I GET VERY VERY EXHAUSTED AND JUZ DUN FEEL LIKE STUDYING !!!
EVERYTIME WHEN I THINK OF THIS, THE MORE I FEEL DETERMINED TO EARN LOTSA MONEY SO THAT I CAN OWN AN APPARTMENT FOR MYSELF AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. SO THAT I DUN HAVE TO FEEL SO SO STUPID RESTRICTED.
ARG !!!! =(
SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO DUE TO SUCH STUFF, I REALLY DETEST TO BE A PARENT IN THE FUTURE.
@%#^$%&*_)*($#%#@$#@#^&*)(*&(*^$#@$@#^^)*$#@!%^^)_*%$#%^&^#*)++><""#@#^^@@*(%$@@%*($##^)*!$^*)%@#%(^%$$*
hmpff. =(
I feel very angry and irritated.
MY MUM STARTED CALLING MY HANDPHONE NON-STOP. AND SHE KEPT REAL CLOSE TO MY TRAVELLING TIME. WHAT THE LA..!!!
CAN'T SHE JUZ BE AWARE THAT WHATEVER SHE IS DOING SUCH THING, IS CREATING ONE LEVEL OF STRESS UP? WHEN I REACH HOME, I CAN'T FOCUS WELL. THAT'S MY STUDY TECHNIQUE AND HABIT. I NEED TO STUDY OUTSIDE !!! AND SHE NEEDS TO KEEP SO SUPER CLOSE TRACK OF ME. AND ALL SHE CAN DO NOW IS TO ADD UNNECESSARY STUPID STRESS ON ME !!!!
EVERY TIME, WHEN I THINK OF THIS, I GET VERY VERY EXHAUSTED AND JUZ DUN FEEL LIKE STUDYING !!!
EVERYTIME WHEN I THINK OF THIS, THE MORE I FEEL DETERMINED TO EARN LOTSA MONEY SO THAT I CAN OWN AN APPARTMENT FOR MYSELF AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. SO THAT I DUN HAVE TO FEEL SO SO STUPID RESTRICTED.
ARG !!!! =(
SOMEHOW IT SEEMS TO DUE TO SUCH STUFF, I REALLY DETEST TO BE A PARENT IN THE FUTURE.
@%#^$%&*_)*($#%#@$#@#^&*)(*&(*^$#@$@#^^)*$#@!%^^)_*%$#%^&^#*)++><""#@#^^@@*(%$@@%*($##^)*!$^*)%@#%(^%$$*
hmpff. =(
I feel very angry and irritated.
Monday, November 13, 2006
tired..
tired.
but it seems to me that things turn outn slightly better...
Finally, one friend of mine is no that mad at me.
dun know recently, i have been like going around making ppl mad... (-_-) wat the...
Thank God, my that fren not tat mad at me. Think still mad, but not so mad as before..
Ok, put this aside first.
Good news.
My buddy is back..!!!!
HAaa..so happy to hear from him at last...!!!
HHAAA...
Been studying in airport for non-stop action pack. REal tired now.
Went youtube.com to watch a few cuts of "Helen the Baby Fox" movie. Super touching. Juz a few mini scenes, and i could feel myself wanting to tear. Sigh..too bad, can't watch over the cinema...
Hearing the "Helen the Baby Fox" music now, again.
If only i could have a chance to hear a real person playing this piece of music, right in front of me, n only for me, i believe i will cry till the whole place is flooded.
Of course, provided the person could play it well. Think this piece of music is not easy to play. Feelings need to be put into while playing it.
Anyway, right now, i only day-dream. haha
Still handling my life being single. Probably i've been attached for too long.
This thurs, my exams start.
Sigh.
Sian.
Heard that ENE competition is pretty tough, tougher than CEE.
WHYYYY...??? (T_T)
but it seems to me that things turn outn slightly better...
Finally, one friend of mine is no that mad at me.
dun know recently, i have been like going around making ppl mad... (-_-) wat the...
Thank God, my that fren not tat mad at me. Think still mad, but not so mad as before..
Ok, put this aside first.
Good news.
My buddy is back..!!!!
HAaa..so happy to hear from him at last...!!!
HHAAA...
Been studying in airport for non-stop action pack. REal tired now.
Went youtube.com to watch a few cuts of "Helen the Baby Fox" movie. Super touching. Juz a few mini scenes, and i could feel myself wanting to tear. Sigh..too bad, can't watch over the cinema...
Hearing the "Helen the Baby Fox" music now, again.
If only i could have a chance to hear a real person playing this piece of music, right in front of me, n only for me, i believe i will cry till the whole place is flooded.
Of course, provided the person could play it well. Think this piece of music is not easy to play. Feelings need to be put into while playing it.
Anyway, right now, i only day-dream. haha
Still handling my life being single. Probably i've been attached for too long.
This thurs, my exams start.
Sigh.
Sian.
Heard that ENE competition is pretty tough, tougher than CEE.
WHYYYY...??? (T_T)
Sunday, November 12, 2006
sigh. (-_-)
Sigh.
Why like this?
Sigh.
Terrible.
Praying hard that things'll turn out fine.
Please please... (T_T)
Sigh. (-_-)
Why like this?
Sigh.
Terrible.
Praying hard that things'll turn out fine.
Please please... (T_T)
Sigh. (-_-)
Saturday, November 11, 2006
NIce.. (",)
haha..nice nice nice...
First time saw Siberian Huskies with white fur..!! Both pups are only 3 months old, blue eyes, pure white fur and not only that, both are pure breed..!! OMG...!! o_O when i saw both of them, i was totally wholly electrified by them.. THEY ARE VERY VERY BEAUTIFUL..!! OMG...when the pups looked at me, i could feel myself being electrified and my heart melting away..
THEY ARE REALLY VERY BEAUTIFUL...they are so beautiful that i can't control myself but to ask the pet safari shop owner about their price. $2800..omg..so expensive..even more expensive than my Lala..according to the shop owner, the normal price for Siberian Husky with the common fur colour is about $2300, for the same age.
Sigh, too bad, i dun have the money now to buy them. Huskies with white fur are very rare.
Good, i have a target again.
I will get a Siberian Husky with white fur next time. I will work hard and earn lotsa of money. Of course, I will target to buy an apartment for myself first before getting a husky. NO choice, my parents dun really like pets to be kept at home. Also, they have been urging me to get myself an appartment. hahaa..yes, these are my targets now..!!
In fact, i have already thought of a name for my future husky le..n it's very nice name, suitable for husky..hahaha..
OK, this is only one happy thing.
NEXT...!!!
OK, next happy thing is that i've scored a A for my "Dogeaters" 1000-words assignment. I was utterly happily shocked..!!! I scored even higher than my "Dracula" assignment..!!! Not only this, i only took 3 hours to write this assignment with little research done.
WHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAA....!!
Me so happy that i hopped towards my parents to tell them my good news..!! hahhahaa...
Real happy over the grade. BUt of course, i need to improve on my grammer, as what my tutor commented in the assignment:
"You present a nicely organized and insightful essay here. Nice work. Need to work on your grammar and clarity.
Grade: A"
hahahh..hmm..ya, this is what i need to improve on. But thanks goodness, she only marked upon my ideas and critics. =p
haha..me so so happy..
Can get to see such beautiful husky n get back such happy grade..!! me happy happy...
I've fallen in deep love with the white-fur, blue-eyed Siberian Husky..
OHHH..OH...please dun drag me out of this secret love...!!! NOoOOoo...
*crap*
First time saw Siberian Huskies with white fur..!! Both pups are only 3 months old, blue eyes, pure white fur and not only that, both are pure breed..!! OMG...!! o_O when i saw both of them, i was totally wholly electrified by them.. THEY ARE VERY VERY BEAUTIFUL..!! OMG...when the pups looked at me, i could feel myself being electrified and my heart melting away..
THEY ARE REALLY VERY BEAUTIFUL...they are so beautiful that i can't control myself but to ask the pet safari shop owner about their price. $2800..omg..so expensive..even more expensive than my Lala..according to the shop owner, the normal price for Siberian Husky with the common fur colour is about $2300, for the same age.
Sigh, too bad, i dun have the money now to buy them. Huskies with white fur are very rare.
Good, i have a target again.
I will get a Siberian Husky with white fur next time. I will work hard and earn lotsa of money. Of course, I will target to buy an apartment for myself first before getting a husky. NO choice, my parents dun really like pets to be kept at home. Also, they have been urging me to get myself an appartment. hahaa..yes, these are my targets now..!!
In fact, i have already thought of a name for my future husky le..n it's very nice name, suitable for husky..hahaha..
OK, this is only one happy thing.
NEXT...!!!
OK, next happy thing is that i've scored a A for my "Dogeaters" 1000-words assignment. I was utterly happily shocked..!!! I scored even higher than my "Dracula" assignment..!!! Not only this, i only took 3 hours to write this assignment with little research done.
WHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAA....!!
Me so happy that i hopped towards my parents to tell them my good news..!! hahhahaa...
Real happy over the grade. BUt of course, i need to improve on my grammer, as what my tutor commented in the assignment:
"You present a nicely organized and insightful essay here. Nice work. Need to work on your grammar and clarity.
Grade: A"
hahahh..hmm..ya, this is what i need to improve on. But thanks goodness, she only marked upon my ideas and critics. =p
haha..me so so happy..
Can get to see such beautiful husky n get back such happy grade..!! me happy happy...
I've fallen in deep love with the white-fur, blue-eyed Siberian Husky..
OHHH..OH...please dun drag me out of this secret love...!!! NOoOOoo...
*crap*
tired but fun..
today's zj's birthday party..
Went her house early and played with dan dan n cookie.
Cookie has toned down real lots and become more obedient. Also, he looks more depressed. Dun know wny too..probably cos of the second entering of the second dog, dan dan.
dan dan is super hyper. jumped on me several times and some more kissed my lips out of the blue. Jus scarificed a kiss to a dog. omg..
But definitely i prefer cookie more..haha..
today's great party though zj doesn't have the time to entertain my click. haha..basically my thic click not very comfortable with crowds, so ended up in her sis's room playing scrabble and decorating her guestbook. think our decorations is the nicest among the rest..
hahaa
but a funny feeling often rises up within me today. it's as if zj is getting married and hm, jac, sindy n i are the bride-maids. Get to see zj dressed up nicely. Like her temporary perm even though her hair is not dyed. She dressed well today. hhaa..but the whole thing looks as if she's getting married. haha..
thinking about getting married, now i'm still wondering who among the five of us will get married first. At first, when i was attached, i would still think zj will get married first, then probably followed by me. But at that time, i still think i'll marry late cos i have to wait for him to settle his career first. but well, now, i din have to wait at all...sigh...anyway i din want to think about this whole stuff as i've already closing myself up le.. hhaa..still who will get married first? hmm..i'm still wondering..haha..but i believe on any of my fren's marriage, i'll think of someone, and could only heave a big sigh. hahahaa..
Still enjoyed the last part of the party when everyone has left, except hm, jac, sindy, me and dly. chatting and eating together around a table...feel so relaxed today le..
at that moment, i could know myself forgetting all about my exams..haha..too bad, cos it's ard the exam period, if not, i will badly want to stay overnight in zj's place...and chit-chat with all of them the whole night long....
Wonder when can have such chance...haha..still feel zj this patch of frens are still the most comfortable group of ppl whom i can be with,.. (^^)
anyway read about next yr's my chinese horoscope..doesn't sound like a good yr to me, in terms of work, love life..
sigh..especially my love life, read it might get complicated...sigh..probably it's meant that i have to break up afterall..n i've decided to close myself up, regarding relationship. cos i know right now, no matter which guy whom i talk to now, i'll have this natural tendency to compare.
arg..sian...i realised i'll still tear a bit when i remembered some stuff related to him. whenever i wait at tamp bus station, will still recall he'll wait for the bus with me, even though he'll not take initiative to hold my hands or anything...n i believe no matter when i do any presentation, i'll remember him as a good presenter and acts as a form of inspiration for me to do well in presentations..but it's in the past le...no point brooding over it, right?
Someone did like me alot but my feelings for him is not strong as he is for me. Besides, i juz want to close myself out to any guy. Will still interact with them la, but maybe the issue of getting a second rs is no longer my priority le..
anyway still, i enjoyed zj's birthday party..!!! (^^)
Went her house early and played with dan dan n cookie.
Cookie has toned down real lots and become more obedient. Also, he looks more depressed. Dun know wny too..probably cos of the second entering of the second dog, dan dan.
dan dan is super hyper. jumped on me several times and some more kissed my lips out of the blue. Jus scarificed a kiss to a dog. omg..
But definitely i prefer cookie more..haha..
today's great party though zj doesn't have the time to entertain my click. haha..basically my thic click not very comfortable with crowds, so ended up in her sis's room playing scrabble and decorating her guestbook. think our decorations is the nicest among the rest..
hahaa
but a funny feeling often rises up within me today. it's as if zj is getting married and hm, jac, sindy n i are the bride-maids. Get to see zj dressed up nicely. Like her temporary perm even though her hair is not dyed. She dressed well today. hhaa..but the whole thing looks as if she's getting married. haha..
thinking about getting married, now i'm still wondering who among the five of us will get married first. At first, when i was attached, i would still think zj will get married first, then probably followed by me. But at that time, i still think i'll marry late cos i have to wait for him to settle his career first. but well, now, i din have to wait at all...sigh...anyway i din want to think about this whole stuff as i've already closing myself up le.. hhaa..still who will get married first? hmm..i'm still wondering..haha..but i believe on any of my fren's marriage, i'll think of someone, and could only heave a big sigh. hahahaa..
Still enjoyed the last part of the party when everyone has left, except hm, jac, sindy, me and dly. chatting and eating together around a table...feel so relaxed today le..
at that moment, i could know myself forgetting all about my exams..haha..too bad, cos it's ard the exam period, if not, i will badly want to stay overnight in zj's place...and chit-chat with all of them the whole night long....
Wonder when can have such chance...haha..still feel zj this patch of frens are still the most comfortable group of ppl whom i can be with,.. (^^)
anyway read about next yr's my chinese horoscope..doesn't sound like a good yr to me, in terms of work, love life..
sigh..especially my love life, read it might get complicated...sigh..probably it's meant that i have to break up afterall..n i've decided to close myself up, regarding relationship. cos i know right now, no matter which guy whom i talk to now, i'll have this natural tendency to compare.
arg..sian...i realised i'll still tear a bit when i remembered some stuff related to him. whenever i wait at tamp bus station, will still recall he'll wait for the bus with me, even though he'll not take initiative to hold my hands or anything...n i believe no matter when i do any presentation, i'll remember him as a good presenter and acts as a form of inspiration for me to do well in presentations..but it's in the past le...no point brooding over it, right?
Someone did like me alot but my feelings for him is not strong as he is for me. Besides, i juz want to close myself out to any guy. Will still interact with them la, but maybe the issue of getting a second rs is no longer my priority le..
anyway still, i enjoyed zj's birthday party..!!! (^^)
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
All tests cleared.
Cleared. All tests cleared. Now left the examinations.
Had a big rest after my french oral test.
Till now, i'm still taking a break.
haa..
Recently my mum is not tat marking me. Get to study outside. FInally..
hahaa
Got a new study place recently. Me quite happy, cos recently my fav place mac has been quite reluctant to letting students study there. I could understand why la. Although they allow us to study there during the weekdays, I could still feel the restrictions. haa..
Recently, my mum has been uptight with the guy friends whom i know. Worry this, worry that...AIYO...i din even think of anything and she keeps evaluating whether this guy has any intention or watever crap. (-_-) AIYOooooOO..lucky thing, i din tell her all the guy friends whom i know. phew.
Basically, right now, all i want to do is to focus on my studies and my interests.
Getting into another relationship?
Na, forget it. I am very very tired.
Been putting almost all my efforts into the first one. I am totally exhausted. Even if I were to get into a 2nd one at this time, it will be definitely half-half, or maybe even less than that. I am really totally exhausted.
Somemore my mum keeps evaluating about guys. Keep telling me to get guys who have the same or higher academic level than me so that i'll not have a tougt marriage life or watever crap stuff...she's making me feel that i need to be materialistic.. (-_-) sian. i know i have to realistic but i dun want to be so materialistic.
Also, she tells me not to read so many literature novels, claim they are not healthy for me. Asks me to read more newspapers. Says I'm too sentimental, probably due to my exposure to few literary texts. o_O i dislike reading newspapers la..!! So boring and dull la..
And recently, all the literature texts which i read and study contain many dark themes. The first text which i come into contact with dark themes is "I am the King of the Castle". Did study Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein" but that theme is not dark enough. The darker themes are basically found more in my 2 current texts - Bram Stoker's "Dracula" and Jessica Hagedorn's "Dogeaters". The movie for Dracula is totally sexual and first time when i saw such movie. haa..not suitable for couples to watch together, cos the guy will definitely do wrong things after watching it. haha..then again, i scored a good A- for tat Dracula assignment.
Think i'll not do well for my "Dogeaters" assignment. The book is still abit cheem for me to understand totally. But i dun really like the language used in this book. Always "f" here and "f" there. I know it has a strong theme of sexuality. It just sounds so vulgar, but then again, that word does create a strong emphasis on that theme. Still like this book, cos it's a very different style as the old english literature texts, which is plotted chronologically and systematically.
Reading such texts do influence my way of thinking and allows me to be more open-minded. Think many times, my open-mindedness seems to bewilder my parents, especially my mum. Probably cos of this, she doesn't really prefer me reading more literary texts. And they want me to read more on philosophy. o_O ah..reading that is even worse la..!! cos not only i'll be more rational, but i'll be more sentimental la..probably even more paranoid..!!
Anyway, basically I am very exhausted about BGR. Very very tired. Have put too much efforts into the first one le. The reasons of me initiating the break-up are not many people who can comprehend and accept. Probably cos i din write out about it in here. And i do not wish to write out here. See no point in doing it anymore.
Think this break-up has been a shock to many friends, further more the initiator is me. hhaa..sigh..never mind, i dun feel like talking about this now. No point talking over it anymore.
Had a big rest after my french oral test.
Till now, i'm still taking a break.
haa..
Recently my mum is not tat marking me. Get to study outside. FInally..
hahaa
Got a new study place recently. Me quite happy, cos recently my fav place mac has been quite reluctant to letting students study there. I could understand why la. Although they allow us to study there during the weekdays, I could still feel the restrictions. haa..
Recently, my mum has been uptight with the guy friends whom i know. Worry this, worry that...AIYO...i din even think of anything and she keeps evaluating whether this guy has any intention or watever crap. (-_-) AIYOooooOO..lucky thing, i din tell her all the guy friends whom i know. phew.
Basically, right now, all i want to do is to focus on my studies and my interests.
Getting into another relationship?
Na, forget it. I am very very tired.
Been putting almost all my efforts into the first one. I am totally exhausted. Even if I were to get into a 2nd one at this time, it will be definitely half-half, or maybe even less than that. I am really totally exhausted.
Somemore my mum keeps evaluating about guys. Keep telling me to get guys who have the same or higher academic level than me so that i'll not have a tougt marriage life or watever crap stuff...she's making me feel that i need to be materialistic.. (-_-) sian. i know i have to realistic but i dun want to be so materialistic.
Also, she tells me not to read so many literature novels, claim they are not healthy for me. Asks me to read more newspapers. Says I'm too sentimental, probably due to my exposure to few literary texts. o_O i dislike reading newspapers la..!! So boring and dull la..
And recently, all the literature texts which i read and study contain many dark themes. The first text which i come into contact with dark themes is "I am the King of the Castle". Did study Mary Shelley's "Frankenstein" but that theme is not dark enough. The darker themes are basically found more in my 2 current texts - Bram Stoker's "Dracula" and Jessica Hagedorn's "Dogeaters". The movie for Dracula is totally sexual and first time when i saw such movie. haa..not suitable for couples to watch together, cos the guy will definitely do wrong things after watching it. haha..then again, i scored a good A- for tat Dracula assignment.
Think i'll not do well for my "Dogeaters" assignment. The book is still abit cheem for me to understand totally. But i dun really like the language used in this book. Always "f" here and "f" there. I know it has a strong theme of sexuality. It just sounds so vulgar, but then again, that word does create a strong emphasis on that theme. Still like this book, cos it's a very different style as the old english literature texts, which is plotted chronologically and systematically.
Reading such texts do influence my way of thinking and allows me to be more open-minded. Think many times, my open-mindedness seems to bewilder my parents, especially my mum. Probably cos of this, she doesn't really prefer me reading more literary texts. And they want me to read more on philosophy. o_O ah..reading that is even worse la..!! cos not only i'll be more rational, but i'll be more sentimental la..probably even more paranoid..!!
Anyway, basically I am very exhausted about BGR. Very very tired. Have put too much efforts into the first one le. The reasons of me initiating the break-up are not many people who can comprehend and accept. Probably cos i din write out about it in here. And i do not wish to write out here. See no point in doing it anymore.
Think this break-up has been a shock to many friends, further more the initiator is me. hhaa..sigh..never mind, i dun feel like talking about this now. No point talking over it anymore.
Saturday, November 04, 2006
sian day..
very sian today..
Din do very well for the hydraulics test.
din manage to prove the first question which all my frens can do it.
Got my 2nd question's water profile wrong..it's M2, not M1.
sian. (-_-)
sigh. Ended up myself getting depressed the whole day. went to eat mac meal for lunch. played games when i reached home. and cried for a while when i reached home. been putting a lot of pressures on myself..sigh..
think i should not mind so much about others' academic progress.
but the more i study engineering, the more i detest it. keep disliking why i ended up myself studying engineering. a course which i detest it very much since secondary sch. been always wanting to be in the medical line. but then look at where i land up myself.
engineering.
but of course, one good thing in ntu is that i can still get to study english and american literature and of course french. if i can't get to study all this humanities-related subjects, think i'm going crazy le..
tomorrow still need to be a tour guide to my sch alumni. feel stupid doing it. cos need to travel so long..
sian..
SIAN..
anyway me be coming from vietnam on the 2nd dec. Dun know whether it'll be fun. but definitely it's something which i've been always wanting to do. be going to hanoi and ha tay. even heard from the organising committee that will get to stay in run-down classrooms etc and there is not much water..
tat's wat i like. can get to experience tough life for a period of time. basically, will be educating the students in hanoi and ha tay about first aid awareness, health care, oral care, computer skills, HIV, and blood donations. Heard thhat also be visiting agent orange victims. sounds cool to me. and definitely it's going to be a great experience of learning to take care of myself. Also, i get to have some leadership opportunities and i'm pretty excited over it.
funny thing, i'm excited over such stuff, and never get excited over engineering stuff. i'm super tired now..
can i not study?
very sian leh..
Din do very well for the hydraulics test.
din manage to prove the first question which all my frens can do it.
Got my 2nd question's water profile wrong..it's M2, not M1.
sian. (-_-)
sigh. Ended up myself getting depressed the whole day. went to eat mac meal for lunch. played games when i reached home. and cried for a while when i reached home. been putting a lot of pressures on myself..sigh..
think i should not mind so much about others' academic progress.
but the more i study engineering, the more i detest it. keep disliking why i ended up myself studying engineering. a course which i detest it very much since secondary sch. been always wanting to be in the medical line. but then look at where i land up myself.
engineering.
but of course, one good thing in ntu is that i can still get to study english and american literature and of course french. if i can't get to study all this humanities-related subjects, think i'm going crazy le..
tomorrow still need to be a tour guide to my sch alumni. feel stupid doing it. cos need to travel so long..
sian..
SIAN..
anyway me be coming from vietnam on the 2nd dec. Dun know whether it'll be fun. but definitely it's something which i've been always wanting to do. be going to hanoi and ha tay. even heard from the organising committee that will get to stay in run-down classrooms etc and there is not much water..
tat's wat i like. can get to experience tough life for a period of time. basically, will be educating the students in hanoi and ha tay about first aid awareness, health care, oral care, computer skills, HIV, and blood donations. Heard thhat also be visiting agent orange victims. sounds cool to me. and definitely it's going to be a great experience of learning to take care of myself. Also, i get to have some leadership opportunities and i'm pretty excited over it.
funny thing, i'm excited over such stuff, and never get excited over engineering stuff. i'm super tired now..
can i not study?
very sian leh..
Thursday, November 02, 2006
Letter | Sick
To: Atticus Darcy
Thanks for helping me with the assignment.
Though you did not help me a lot in the assignment, your few words carried weight and inspiration to my writing at that moment.
Afterall i am a woman, a woman who knows little about justice, pride and prejudice.
But i will pray that you will do well in your regime.
Signing off,
Elizabeth Bennet Proctor.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sick for the whole day.
Sneezed the whole day..arg... (-_-)
lucky thing, my mum made some ginger drinks for me. Dun really like drinking it much cos it has a very strong smell of 'cong1' (dun know its name in english). But still, i drank it cos it'll be good for health. ha..
afternoon, nose is running a marathon. Now, it's running 2.4 km. Much better le.
Think i prefer talking to myself, as in writing blog. Start dislike opening my mouth and talking to people. Dun wan will have such a habit now. think my mouth is very tired too, and needs to take a break. HA..!!
Will be going overseas to vietnam on the 14th dec, instead of 6th dec. Wonder how the whole thing will be like. Going there wif a group of NTU ppl, instead of with my family. Think it'll be a great experience for me. I believe i will learn alot...haa...
Now my fingers are tired too.
I am a silent lamb.
A silent crab.
This is my life.
My life of silence.
Thanks for helping me with the assignment.
Though you did not help me a lot in the assignment, your few words carried weight and inspiration to my writing at that moment.
Afterall i am a woman, a woman who knows little about justice, pride and prejudice.
But i will pray that you will do well in your regime.
Signing off,
Elizabeth Bennet Proctor.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sick for the whole day.
Sneezed the whole day..arg... (-_-)
lucky thing, my mum made some ginger drinks for me. Dun really like drinking it much cos it has a very strong smell of 'cong1' (dun know its name in english). But still, i drank it cos it'll be good for health. ha..
afternoon, nose is running a marathon. Now, it's running 2.4 km. Much better le.
Think i prefer talking to myself, as in writing blog. Start dislike opening my mouth and talking to people. Dun wan will have such a habit now. think my mouth is very tired too, and needs to take a break. HA..!!
Will be going overseas to vietnam on the 14th dec, instead of 6th dec. Wonder how the whole thing will be like. Going there wif a group of NTU ppl, instead of with my family. Think it'll be a great experience for me. I believe i will learn alot...haa...
Now my fingers are tired too.
I am a silent lamb.
A silent crab.
This is my life.
My life of silence.
hmm,
Finally i've something good about my tests.
Gotten an A- for my english literature Bram Stoker's "Dracula" 1000-words assignment. YEAH..!! Finally, i've a good grade for one of my tests..!! Finally..!! Enfin..!! haa..
I was real happy when i got back the grade yesterday. A- is the highest grade of all the rest and i'm one of the few who scored an A- for it. haa..i din really expect it, only expecting to get a B, due to my poor command of english and grammical mistakes. haa..but i believe i'm graded well for my ideas and critics. still, glad that my this american tutor is open-minded. hhaa..
Still, i'll get worried for its exam papers. Still remembered when i took another literature-related module during one semester, i also got an A- for my assignment but ended up getting a B for overall, due to the exams paper which i think i dun fare very well. Scare that this time, i'll get the same grade again for my this module. =x
What a pity, my this module is juz a prescribed elective. SiAN.
(-_-)
haa..also, gotten my new laptop today..!! my acer's travelmate 3010..!! With the weight of 1.5 kg and a screen sized 12", i simply love it. Besides that, it only costs 2,149 bucks, with intel dual core, 1 Gb DDR2, DVD-super multi double layer..etc..think it's quite a good specs for my usage. haa..anyway use my own money to pay for this laptop. I have the finance to support it, so i dun wan my parents to pay for me. They have paid a great deal for my education, especially my university fees.
Alors, il s'appelle Lala...
Haa..crap...
Gotten an A- for my english literature Bram Stoker's "Dracula" 1000-words assignment. YEAH..!! Finally, i've a good grade for one of my tests..!! Finally..!! Enfin..!! haa..
I was real happy when i got back the grade yesterday. A- is the highest grade of all the rest and i'm one of the few who scored an A- for it. haa..i din really expect it, only expecting to get a B, due to my poor command of english and grammical mistakes. haa..but i believe i'm graded well for my ideas and critics. still, glad that my this american tutor is open-minded. hhaa..
Still, i'll get worried for its exam papers. Still remembered when i took another literature-related module during one semester, i also got an A- for my assignment but ended up getting a B for overall, due to the exams paper which i think i dun fare very well. Scare that this time, i'll get the same grade again for my this module. =x
What a pity, my this module is juz a prescribed elective. SiAN.
(-_-)
haa..also, gotten my new laptop today..!! my acer's travelmate 3010..!! With the weight of 1.5 kg and a screen sized 12", i simply love it. Besides that, it only costs 2,149 bucks, with intel dual core, 1 Gb DDR2, DVD-super multi double layer..etc..think it's quite a good specs for my usage. haa..anyway use my own money to pay for this laptop. I have the finance to support it, so i dun wan my parents to pay for me. They have paid a great deal for my education, especially my university fees.
Alors, il s'appelle Lala...
Haa..crap...
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